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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods,rice, wheat and maize, by people in four different countries

The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods,rice, wheat and maize, by people in four different countries
The chart compares how much the
consumption
Use synonyms
 of three basic
food
Fix the agreement mistake
foods
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,
rice
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,
wheat
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 and
maize
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, by people in Cambodia,
Poland
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, Egypt and Mexico.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that
rice
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 is more
popular
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popularly consumed
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consumption
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 in
Combodia
Correct your spelling
Cambodia
.Coming to
product
Correct article usage
the product
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 of
wheat
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 is more consumed
to
Change preposition
than
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wheat
Use synonyms
 and
maize
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with
Punctuation problem
, with
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 18 and 103, respectively. Regarding,
Mexico
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Mexican
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 people prefer
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Maize to eat
Correct word order
to eat maize
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 about 1085.
In addition
Linking Words
,
wheat
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 is eaten 3 times more than
rice
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. Coming to Egypt, there are
many
Fix the agreement mistake
more
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 humans
Correct pronoun usage
who consumed
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consumed
Wrong verb form
consume
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wheat
Use synonyms
 1095 than
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
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maize
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. In terms of
Poland
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, the
consumption
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 of
rices
Fix the agreement mistake
rice
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less
Verb problem
is less
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 than other grocery products in
this
Linking Words
 area.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, figures
of
Change preposition
for
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wheat
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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to
Change preposition
apply
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about 865
,
Punctuation problem
;
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this
Linking Words
 chart shows that
maize
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 was not consumed at all. In summary, the highest
consumption
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 of
rice
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 in Cambodia and
wheat
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 is
Change preposition
in Rgypt
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Rgypt
Correct your spelling
Egypt
, closely followed by
Poland
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. Meanwhile, Mexican people enjoy eating
maize
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, but no one in
Poland
Use synonyms
 consumes it

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, rice, wheat, maize, poland with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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