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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The two maps below show the changes in a town called Dalton from 1815 to 2015.

The two maps below show the changes in a town called Dalton from 1815 to 2015.
Two maps depict the major changes in the layout of the
town
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 of
Dalton
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 from 1815 to 2015
Overall
Linking Words
, the
town
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Use synonyms
Dalton
Change preposition
of Dalton
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is
Wrong verb form
has been
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 specifically changed to industrialism and modernised. Before, it was specifically farm and forest areas. In 1815, there were a bunch of
trees
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 located at the corner of the layout
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 at the opposite side of those
trees
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, another group of
trees
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 were available. In the middle of those
trees
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, there was a
river
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 which crossed them. The source of water from the
river
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 came from the
River
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 Dai. A large monument called
Dalton
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 , which represented the
town
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's name located beyond the few
residental
Correct your spelling
residential
 houses. There was a farm facing the
river
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 , and animals
such
Linking Words
 as cows, horses were kept there. By 2015, the
town
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Use synonyms
Dalton
Change preposition
of Dalton
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 faced
to
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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enormous changes. The number of
trees
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 removed and residential areas and industrial zones built. They representative monument called
Dalton
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 replaced it
instead
Linking Words
 of a bunch of
trees
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 , which was opposite the industrial zone.
Linking Words
Additionally
Add a comma
Additionally,
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 the hospital was built right next to the industrial zone and
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 houses. The bridge was built in order to allow the inhabitants to cross in order to get to the Airport. The
amount
Check wording
number
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 of houses increased surprisingly , and in the centre of the building, a large school was built next to the monument of
Dalton
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. The
River
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 Dai decreased
by
Change preposition
in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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size, providing enough space for the construction of the Airport. The hotel was built
at
Change preposition
on
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 the southeast side of the map

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words town, dalton, trees, river with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
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