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Writing Samples
Band 7

the line graph shows the number of immigrants to 3 countries [USA , Canada , Australia ] from 1991 to 2001 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

the line graph shows the number of immigrants to 3 countries [USA , Canada , Australia ] from 1991 to 2001 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given line diagram illustrates the
number
Use synonyms
 of individuals who immigrated to three nations
;
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
,
Canada
Use synonyms
, and
Australia
Use synonyms
 between 1991 and 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
,
the immigration to
Correct word order
immigration to the
show examples
USA
Use synonyms
 and
Canada
Use synonyms
 increased during that period of time,
while
Linking Words
 the
USA
Use synonyms
 was the
number
Use synonyms
 one destination for people by 2001.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the
nember
Correct your spelling
number
 of
immigrants
Use synonyms
 to
Australia
Use synonyms
 decreased. In 1991,
Australia
Use synonyms
 had the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
immigrants
Use synonyms
, which dropped
steady
Replace the word
steadily
show examples
 from approximately 2600 to 500 in the next four years. The chart hit a low at 500 in 1995 and continued the same till 2001.
In contrast
Linking Words
 to
Australia
Use synonyms
,
Canada
Use synonyms
, with 500, was the least favourite destination for
immigrants
Use synonyms
 in 1991.
However
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 rose almost gradually and
then
Linking Words
 sharply till 1995, when it hit a peak at around 2300,
then
Linking Words
 dropped suddenly to 1100 by
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 year.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it stayed the same till 1999, and afterwards increased to 1600 by 2001. Similar to
Canada
Use synonyms
, the
USA
Use synonyms
 experienced a steady increase, from about 1100 newcomers in 1991 to 2500
immigrants
Use synonyms
 in 2000,
then
Linking Words
 it remained stable till 2001.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, usa, canada, australia, immigrants with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • increase
  • rise
  • grow
  • go up
  • fall
  • drop
  • decrease
  • change
  • steady
  • gradual
  • sharp
  • high
  • low
  • number
  • people
  • immigrant
  • immigrants
  • country
  • year
  • period
  • trend
  • compare
  • difference
  • similar
  • different
  • peak
  • start
  • end
  • mid
  • late
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