IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Online currencies have become more common in recent years. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relev

In
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
 era, internet technology has developed dramatically, and
commonly
Verb problem
is commonly
show examples
 used in almost all industries.
Hence
Linking Words
, the banking services transmuted into online , which enables consumer to
utilize
Change the spelling
utilise
show examples
 Internet banking as their main
account
Use synonyms
. I believe
this
Linking Words
 is a beneficial change,
due to
Linking Words
 the convenience and time-effectiveness it provides The first reason to support my state is that online banking can be
convienience
Correct your spelling
convenient
. In the previous system,
people
Use synonyms
 had to go to the stores to move
money
Use synonyms
 to another
account
Use synonyms
. You can now access the same service anywhere by using your smartphone.
This
Linking Words
 makes
people
Use synonyms
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
save their time and effort to go to the actual store.
In addition
Linking Words
, online service can record all your purchases in
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 app. If you are to make a record of your monthly income and
expense
Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
show examples
, it is easier to put all the data by using an online
account
Use synonyms
. It makes
people
Use synonyms
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
be
congnitious
Correct your spelling
conscious
 about the extra
money
Use synonyms
 they
use
Verb problem
spend
show examples
 and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
people
Use synonyms
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
focus on saving
money
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, I'm using a banking
account
Use synonyms
 attached to a
money
Use synonyms
 recording app to easily evaluate what I'm actually spending
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
. It
prevent
Correct subject-verb agreement
prevents
show examples
 me from spending excessive
money
Use synonyms
 in the ongoing month, when I feel I spent too much in the previous month. In conclusion, online currency is
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 amazing invention which makes
people
Use synonyms
 both convenient and helps make more savings. I strongly support that net banking is a beneficial
changes
Fix the agreement mistake
change
show examples
 in the banking services.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

language
Fix spelling and grammar, especially common mistakes like convienience, congnitious, It prevent me, and missing words.
content
Stay on one topic. The essay talks about online money and banks; be sure to answer the given idea about online currencies.
coherence
Use linking words to join ideas smoothly, like first, also, but, and then.
examples
Give a clear example and explain it in simple terms.
grammar
Check verb form and noun agreement (It prevents, online is, a app -> an app).
idea
There is a clear view that online banking can be good.
structure
Personal example is used to show thinking.
content
Some reasons are given for the benefit of online banking.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: