IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, an increasing number of complaints from the
working-class
Use the right word
working class
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has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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aroused
Verb problem
raised
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 awareness regarding whether to shorten the working week. In my opinion, I utterly agree with the statement that
workers
Use synonyms
 should have a longer
weekend
Use synonyms
, and the reasons will be illustrated as follows. First of all, a long working week would be tedious and stressful for almost every worker. If the government shortened the working
weekday
Replace the word
week
show examples
,
workers
Use synonyms
 might feel valued and understood, which can enhance their sense of belonging in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, people are more willing to cooperate with each other,
further
Linking Words
 improving social cohesion.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a longer
weekend
Use synonyms
 provides
workers
Use synonyms
 with more quality time to alleviate the accumulated pressure and accompany their families,
thus
Linking Words
 harmonising
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the imbalance between work and life is one of the most significant problems that every worker should put emphasis on. If the
blue collar
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blue-collar
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workers
Use synonyms
 had more time to regain their body
strengths
Fix the agreement mistake
strength
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 by taking more rest, they could work far more
efficient
Replace the word
efficiently
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 than
the
Use the right word
they
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 present.
Similarly
Linking Words
, should the white collar
workers
Use synonyms
 have more time to reorganise their ideas, they might be much more creative and more competent at thinking out of the box.
Hence
Linking Words
, it can be easily predicted that
workers
Use synonyms
 will be motivated by having a longer
weekend
Use synonyms
,
as a result
Linking Words
 of boosting the economy. In conclusion, I hold a strong and unwavering conviction that the initiative on prolonging the
weekend
Use synonyms
 should be implemented as soon as possible with an eye to building a cohesive society and flourishing economy.

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task
Add more specific ideas and examples to back your points. Tie each paragraph to one main idea.
structure
Make the order of ideas clear: start with a general statement, then give reasons, and finish with a summary.
coherence
Use topic sentences at the start of each paragraph to show clear focus.
grammar
Use simple, correct grammar. Check phrases like 'more efficient' → 'more efficiently'.
lexical
Stay with simple vocabulary from the top 100 words. Avoid rare words and awkward collocations.
structure
Clear position is stated in the introduction and conclusion.
coherence
Good use of linking words to connect ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
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