IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the monthly expenditure of an average Australian family in 1991 and 2001. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the monthly expenditure of an average Australian family in 1991 and 2001. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given table illustrates the average expenditure in
month
Fix the agreement mistake
months
show examples
 in Australia, over a 10-year period, from 1991 to 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
, most money was spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the other goods and
services
Use synonyms
 section during
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 period,
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
clothing
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
remained the
last
Linking Words
 tendency. In 1991,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
 goods and
services
Use synonyms
 were the dominant trend, accounting for 250 dollars. The food
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 was the second trend with 155$
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 total.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many people
also
Linking Words
 spend a huge amount of money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 housing, at 95$. The electricity and water, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
transport demonstrated
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
similar trends, with 75$ and 70$. The
last
Linking Words
 tendency was clothing, accounting
up
Change preposition
for
show examples
 only 30$.
At the end
Linking Words
 total was 675$. Regarding the data, by 2001, all
services
Use synonyms
 increased, except the clothing and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
transport,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 were decreased slightly, to 20 and 45 dollars.
According to
Linking Words
 details, the food and the housing went up by 5$, highlighting 160 and 100
dollars
Check wording
apply
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the electricity and water, and the other goods and
services
Use synonyms
, grew a little more, and
representing
Wrong verb form
represent
show examples
 120$ and 270$.
Finally
Linking Words
, after a 10-year period, the total increased
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
 40$,
highlighting
Verb problem
reaching
show examples
 715$.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words services with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • average family
  • significant changes
  • substantial increases
  • categories of expenditure
  • inflation
  • lifestyle changes
  • economic factors
  • cost of living
  • monthly expenditure
  • overall trend
  • comparisons
  • ten-year period
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