IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The environment problems facing today's world are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. Government and large companies should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In recent years, the issue of the responsibility for reducing the amount of environmental
damage
Use synonyms
 should be borne by
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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 and large enterprises has sparked heated debate. From my perspective, I totally agree with the idea that.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, one of the main reasons why I agree is that large corporations are the primary sources of pollution.
This
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 is because many large manufacturing
companies
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 discharge large volumes of wastewater and exhaust gases during their production processes.
For example
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, many chemical enterprises release waste gases into the atmosphere, most of which are colored. Even with relatively effective environmental protection measures, they cannot completely guarantee the absence of toxic gas emissions. Not only noxious gases, but
also
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 wastewater with excessive metal content.
This
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cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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 significant
damage
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 to the soil.
As a result
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, small and medium-sized
companies
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 are not as polluted by large
companies
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.
Furthermore
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, another compelling argument in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of
this
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 view is that the
government
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 should assume the corresponding regulatory responsibilities. Indeed, the
government
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 must clearly define enterprises’ environmental responsibilities and obligations,
as well as
Linking Words
 establish appropriate emission standards. At the same time,
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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 should establish a professional supervision team which
monitor
Correct subject-verb agreement
monitors
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 all businesses to ensure they do not discharge pollutants illegally. If
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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 discovers
ant
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any
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 illegal activities, it should impose penalties immediately.
Such
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 an approach would effectively reduce pollution so
that
Correct word choice
as that
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 make a better environment.
Therefore
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, the
government
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 can indirectly raise large businesses’ awareness of environmental
damage
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. In conclusion, I firmly believe that
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and large
companies
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 should significantly reduce the amount of environmental
damage
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. Only by doing so can we enjoy a beautiful living environment.

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grammar
Fix grammar where word endings are wrong, e.g. 'This cause' should be 'This causes'. Also 'ant illegal activities' should be 'illegal activities'.
structure
Make the intro clear. State your view in one line and briefly list your reasons.
coherence
Use simple, correct phrases. Break long sentences into shorter ones to avoid mistakes.
content
Add more clear examples and explain how they show your point.
lexical
Check spelling and keep to common words from daily use.
task-response
You state a clear view and keep it through the essay.
coherence
You use linking words to show flow between ideas.
content
You discuss government and big firms as parts of the solution in a straightforward way.
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