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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the number of visitors to four international museums between 1980 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows the number of visitors to four international museums between 1980 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The chart illustrates the main information on the changing number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 to four different international
museums
Use synonyms
 from 1980 to 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
Louvre
Use synonyms
 is at the top of popularity among tourists,
while
Linking Words
 the
London
Use synonyms
Science
Use synonyms
 Museum has experienced a roughly diminish over the given period. Focus on the
Louvre
Use synonyms
, it started from approximately 8
million
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
 and continued with a slight increase until 1995 and reached around 9
million
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
. After 2015, it experienced a decrease, but it still remains at a high level. Eventually, it reached its peak in 2015. The Vatican
Museums
Use synonyms
 follow increasing popularity similar to the
Louvre
Use synonyms
; it has consistently grown during these 35 years and reached around 9
million
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
London
Use synonyms
Museums
Use synonyms
'
science
Use synonyms
 section was at its peak for the first 5 years, but gradually decreased , and its
visitors
Use synonyms
 were half.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 Shenzhen
Museums
Use synonyms
 hold lower interest among tourists and its figures were under 4
million
Use synonyms
, during the initial two decades, it has declined , but after 2000, it overtook the
London
Use synonyms
Science
Use synonyms
Museums
Use synonyms
 and had a small increase and reached 4
million
Use synonyms
 visits in a year again. In summary, the
Louvre
Use synonyms
 and the Vatican
museums
Use synonyms
 still retain their popularity among people, and statistics show their growth. Other hand, the
London
Use synonyms
Science
Use synonyms
 Museum had lost its
visitors
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 the Shenzhen museum fluctuated ,
overall
Linking Words
 its number is similar to the beginning.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although, overall".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, museums, louvre, london, science, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • visitor numbers
  • trend analysis
  • stability
  • popularity
  • significant changes
  • peak periods
  • low points
  • global tourism trends
  • economic downturns
  • natural disasters
  • tourist patterns
  • dynamic nature
  • factors influencing
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