IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Its
Use the right word
It's
show examples
 commonly argued that colleges should
admitted
Wrong verb form
admit
show examples
 the same
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
pupils
Check wording
students
show examples
 in every
majors
Fix the agreement mistake
major
show examples
. Personally, I tend to strongly oppose
this
Linking Words
 statement for a variety of reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, individuals have different
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 forcing them
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 a
catergory
Correct your spelling
category
 of a subject is a
surpression
Correct your spelling
suppression
 of curiosity.
Men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
 tend to have
oposite
Correct your spelling
opposite
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
 and
passion
Fix the agreement mistake
passions
show examples
 in choosing majors and minors.
For instance
Linking Words
, a report from BBC has surveyed 100 people mixed in
genders
Use synonyms
, which most
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
catergories
Correct your spelling
categories
 differ
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
on
Change preposition
by
show examples
Use synonyms
genders
Fix the agreement mistake
gender
show examples
, the
Punctuation problem
. The
show examples
 trend among
men
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 business and engineering
Punctuation problem
, whearas
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whearas
Correct your spelling
whereas
women
Use synonyms
choosing
Wrong verb form
choose
show examples
 nursing and teaching as a major is very common.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is important to consider the contrast between
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
 in their personal
value
Fix the agreement mistake
values
show examples
 and
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, not every subject
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 appealing to
every
Use the right word
everyone
show examples
 one as stated above
Punctuation problem
, its
show examples
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 personal valuation, so to
have
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the estimate
Correct word order
estimate the
show examples
 number of applicants will be near impossible. Every subject has thousands of attendees every year, making the gender estimation
became
Verb problem
apply
show examples
useless.
For example
Linking Words
, a university can not
expelled
Wrong verb form
expel
show examples
 many good male
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 to admit more
women
Use synonyms
 just because of the imbalance in
genders
Use synonyms
, which is obnoxious. As a
Fix the agreement mistake
result
show examples
results
Add a comma
results,
show examples
 many
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
show examples
 still have
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
 gender imbalance
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is crucial to have a look
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 many factors
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the deciding process of students
not
Punctuation problem
, not
show examples
 just their biological gender. In conclusion, the statement
that
Linking Words
is saying
Wrong verb form
says
show examples
 that universities should have
balance
Correct article usage
a balance
show examples
 in
genders
Use synonyms
 in subjects, for
me
Punctuation problem
me,
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 is absurd
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
 nothing is flawless and having more male or female students in faculties
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 indubitably nothing to be concerned
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
.

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structure
Plan your essay before you write. Put your view in one clear sentence. Then give two or three reasons with simple proof.
grammar/vocabulary
Use simple and clear language. Check spelling and word form so ideas are easy to read.
content
Add more real and clear examples to back each point. Explain how each point makes you disagree.
stance
You take a clear stance against the idea.
structure
There is a basic shape of essay: intro, body, and conclusion.
content
Some reasons are given to show your view.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender diversity
  • fostering innovation
  • educational experience
  • enforcing gender quotas
  • merit and potential
  • individual achievements
  • natural differences
  • gender equality
  • reducing gender stereotypes
  • balanced workforce
  • traditionally male-dominated or female-dominated fields
  • fluctuating applicant numbers
  • compromise on quality
  • diversity aspects
What to do next:
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