IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The maps below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The maps below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The maps
illustrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrate
show examples
 the development of
Queen
Use synonyms
Mary
Use synonyms
 Hospital from 1960 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, there were major
development
Fix the agreement mistake
developments
show examples
 in several utilities
such
Linking Words
 as
Pharmacy
Correct article usage
the Pharmacy
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, Cancer
centre
Use synonyms
, and Nursing
school
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the main building and main road remained
same
Correct article usage
the same
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,
while
Linking Words
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
the car
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park
Use synonyms
area
Use synonyms
 became smaller.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 1960, there were two major
building
Fix the agreement mistake
buildings
show examples
 in
Queen
Use synonyms
Mary
Use synonyms
 Hospital -
Hospital
Correct article usage
the Hospital
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 building
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and
Shopping
Correct article usage
the Shopping
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Centre
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Farmland
Correct article usage
the Farmland
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 and
Use synonyms
Car
Correct article usage
the Car
show examples
park
Use synonyms
located
Verb problem
are located
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 behind these main buildings. After 20 years,
Queen
Use synonyms
Mary
Use synonyms
utilized
Change the spelling
utilised
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 the farmland
became
Correct word choice
and became
show examples
 a nursing
school
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
shopping
Correct article usage
a shopping
show examples
centre
Use synonyms
 developed into
Pharmacy
Correct article usage
a Pharmacy
show examples
 and
Cancer
Correct article usage
a Cancer
show examples
centre
Use synonyms
. In 2000,
Cancer
Correct article usage
the Cancer
show examples
centre
Use synonyms
area
Use synonyms
 grew significantly and took
nursing
Correct article usage
the nursing
show examples
school
Use synonyms
area
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the
school
Use synonyms
 was
relocate
Wrong verb form
relocated
show examples
 into
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
park
Use synonyms
area
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
park
Use synonyms
area
Use synonyms
 remained a part of
Queen
Use synonyms
Mary
Use synonyms
 Hospital.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words queen, mary, centre, school, car, park, area with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructural evolution
  • healthcare facilities
  • technological advancements
  • capacity expansion
  • modernization efforts
  • historical layout
  • landscape adaptation
  • access routes
  • renovation and improvement
  • initial structure
  • environmental considerations
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