IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that university education should focus on preparing students for specific careers. Others think it should provide general knowledge useful for all aspects of life. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People have
distinc
Correct your spelling
distinct
 views as to whether academic
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
 should focus
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 specific occupations or institution of higher learning should provide
high-qualified
Use the right word
high-quality
show examples
 education
that is
Linking Words
 beneficial for all aspects of life. Undoubtedly, universities should be dedicated to
teach
Wrong verb form
teaching
show examples
students
Use synonyms
 for specific careers, as
this
Linking Words
 system helps them attain professorial rank faster
Linking Words
then
Use the right word
than
show examples
 it used to be.
For instance
Linking Words
, if
Use synonyms
knowledge
Correct article usage
a knowledge
show examples
 seeker
will acquire
Wrong verb form
acquires
show examples
 education
truly
Correct pronoun usage
that truly
show examples
belong
Correct subject-verb agreement
belongs
show examples
 to them,
then
Linking Words
 in the future they can get
professor
Correct article usage
a professor
show examples
 rank
fater
Correct your spelling
father
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
 instructs related field of study to them ,
then
Linking Words
 they engage in academic inquiry
simultaneously
Punctuation problem
, simultaneously
show examples
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
experiment
Correct article usage
an experiment
show examples
 if possible ,to master their
knowledge
Use synonyms
. A decade
later
Punctuation problem
later,
show examples
 people will be ready
then
Linking Words
 that of
students
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 who studied general
knowledge
Use synonyms
.
Furthemore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, individuals
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
who
acquiring
Wrong verb form
acquire
show examples
 broad-based
knowledge
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 may find it harder to get a job quickly, since they do not have the exact skills that some
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 need,
while
Linking Words
students
Use synonyms
 who studied
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
show examples
 field will be employed
then
Linking Words
 them.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, people acquiring general education will have more flexible trade options, they can work in many different
sphere
Fix the agreement mistake
spheres
show examples
 because their
knowledge
Use synonyms
 is broad.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 they will have better problem-solving skills , they can learn to think in
defferent
Correct your spelling
different
ways
Punctuation problem
ways,
show examples
 connect some ideas to each other and figure out
solution
Correct article usage
a solution
show examples
 than
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
 of
students
Use synonyms
 who studied specific subjects.
Finaly
Correct your spelling
Finally
, they can adapt easily to changes,
for example
Linking Words
: if
job
Correct article usage
the job
show examples
 market
changes
Punctuation problem
changes,
show examples
 they can switch careers more easily.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
In
Fix capitalization
in
show examples
 my perspective, I think that the best path depends on the student’s long-term goals and personal strengths

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
State your main view clearly in the first paragraph with a short sentence that acts as your thesis.
structure
Make a clear plan for the essay: intro, view A with reasons, view B with reasons, your view, and a short conclusion.
language
Check spelling and grammar. Use simple words and short sentences.
cohesion
Link ideas simply and with clear words like 'also', 'but', 'however', and 'for example' to help flow.
content
You show both sides of the topic.
content
You end with a simple conclusion phrase 'To conclude'.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: