IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Overpopulation is a problem that many countries face nowadays, some suggest that to solve this the one child policy should be implemented per family. Do you agree or disagree?

Over the past decade, there
is
Wrong verb form
has been
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 a dramatic increase in
percentage of the
Correct word order
the percentage of
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human kind
Use the right word
humankind
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. Some nations are implementing a policy that
limit
Correct subject-verb agreement
limits
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 the number of
birth
Fix the agreement mistake
births
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 per family in order to slow down a
prospective
Correct word choice
potential
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 problem that may occur in the future called overpopulation.
I
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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in
Change preposition
From
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 my perspective, I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss all the details. On the one hand,
A
Correct article usage
apply
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large families that
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 many children are considered
old fashion
Use the right word
old-fashioned
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due to
Linking Words
 the difficulty of raising and feeding them the proper way,
can
Correct pronoun usage
which can
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 be explained as the quantity
is
Verb problem
apply
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exceeding the quality.
Linking Words
for
Fix capitalization
For
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 instance, people are immigrating
the
Change preposition
to the
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countrysides
Fix the agreement mistake
countryside
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 and moving into the large cities in order to track the
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern fast lifestyle of working and parenting
one
Correct determiner usage
a
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 single child. It is much convenient to live
such
Linking Words
 a life in a small condo and have
short
Correct article usage
a short
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 walk
when ever
Use the right word
whenever
show examples
 you need to buy groceries. On
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
the other hand, governments can allocate the natural resources wisely with
minimum
Correct article usage
a minimum
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 number of citizens
Linking Words
as
Punctuation problem
, as
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 well as keeping the environment clean. For illustration, the
less
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer
show examples
 people using the public facilities
the
Punctuation problem
, the
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 less
maintainace
Correct your spelling
maintenance
 needed periodically.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
fewer
Fix the agreement mistake
less
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 plastic will be consumed
due to
Linking Words
 the
society
Replace the word
societal
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 awareness of the harmful effects that
came
Wrong verb form
come
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 from the
people
Check wording
apply
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diversity.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
In
Fix capitalization
in
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 my own point of view, I firmly
belive
Use the right word
believe
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 that authorities must advertise the benefits the birth control to the families. Since it will manage a massive amount of potential problems
will
Correct pronoun usage
that will
show examples
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
arise in the future.

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language
Fix bad spelling and grammar. Use simple word order and short sentences.
structure
Make a clear plan before you write. Use an intro, two or three body parts, then a short end.
content
Explain one point at a time. Give at least one clear example for each idea.
coherence
Link ideas with easy words like 'and', 'but', 'also' to connect ideas.
content
Your view is clear.
content
You give a main point about why birth control may help.
structure
There is some good attempt to use two sides of the issue.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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