IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person’s culture and character from their choice of clothes. Do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that we can know a lot about a person's
culture
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 and
character
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 from their choice of
clothes
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.I practly agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea,
beacause
Correct your spelling
because
 sometimes it's true,but it is not always. First of all,
clothes
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 can
show
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 a person's
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culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 background.In my
county
Use the right word
country
show examples
China
Punctuation problem
, China
show examples
,for
example
Change preposition
For example
show examples
,
people
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 usually like to wear red
clothes
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 during the Spring Festival or when they have a wedding,because red means good luck ,happiness,and success in Chinese
culture
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , when
people
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 go to a funeral,they often wear black or white
clothes
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.It shows sadness and respect.So
clothes
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 can
show
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 our traditions and how we respect special days.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
clothes
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 can sometimes tell us something about a person’s
character
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.
People
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 who like
colorful
Change the spelling
colourful
show examples
clothes
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 often look more active and cheerful,
while
Linking Words
people
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 who wear simple or dark
clothes
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 may seem
more quiet
Correct word choice
quieter
show examples
 or serious. Some young
people
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 like to wear special or unusual
clothes
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 to
show
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 that they are creative or want to be different from others.
However
Linking Words
,it is
also
Linking Words
 important to remember that
clothes
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 are not always the best way to understand a person.Some
people
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 wear
clothes
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 just for work or fashion.
Such
Linking Words
 as teachers and office workers wear formal suits every workday,but it doesn't mean that they all have the same
character
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. In conclusion,
clothes
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 can sometimes
show
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culture
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 and
character
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,but we should not judge
people
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 only by what they wear.

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task
Make your view clear in the first line and say it again at the end. It helps the reader know your position fast.
coherence
Link parts with small words like 'and', 'but', 'for example' to move from one idea to the next.
grammar
Fix grammar and spellings. Use spaces after commas and full stops.
content
Use more real and clear examples to prove your points.
language
Try short, plain sentences so the map of your idea is easy to read.
content
The idea that clothes may show a culture and a mind is clear.
content
The essay uses a real tie to China and its spring and funeral days as examples.
structure
There is a basic plan of start, body and end in the writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • garments
  • traditional attire
  • sartorial choices
  • expressive style
  • cultural identity
  • psychological implications
  • non-verbal cues
  • globalization
  • perceptions
  • professional demeanor
  • societal norms
  • economic constraints
  • subcultures
  • fashion movements
  • individualism
  • stereotype
What to do next:
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