IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

some people think that good teamwork makes a company successful, while others think that good leadership is the reason behind the success of a company. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Despite the fact that it has been pointed out that excellent collaboration contributes to a profitable firm, some people believe that the reason why a
company
Use synonyms
 earns countless amounts of money is good leadership. Personally, I agree with the former idea as sharing various thinking styles between employees results in a successful
company
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, some individuals, including me, argue that employees' cooperation is the main feature to makes a
company
Use synonyms
 successful. The reason is that, as every member has their different characteristics, they have distinct thoughts towards one problem. If a corporation tends to collect various ideas about an issue from its staff, the leaders of
this
Linking Words
company
Use synonyms
 are more likely to make the right decision,
thus
Linking Words
 running a successful organisation.
For instance
Linking Words
, the most famous accounting firms,
such
Linking Words
 as PWC and KPMG, always encourage their workers to share information when they make a decision. Their supervisors say that different employees have different educational and cultural backgrounds, so the workers’ wide range of ideas is beneficial to make decisions efficiently and accurately and even determines their firm’s success.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, other people opine that an outstanding leader is a crucial element of a successful organisation.
This
Linking Words
 is because a professional leader has the ability to adjust the
company
Use synonyms
's strategies when a variety of issues arise, which is more important than working in harmony. As an illustration, a huge number of owners whose companies have shut down state that
although
Linking Words
 their different departments could work in a harmonious environment, they did not have a manager who was equipped with a wide range of skills to navigate their firms, which caused the need for them to close down. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 people may vary in their opinions about what factors result in a profitable and productive corporation, I am of the opinion that cooperation between workers is the vital influencer in operating a successful business.

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grammar
Use simpler grammar and shorter sentences to avoid long run-ons. Check verb forms and article use to fix common errors.
structure
Make the stance clear in the intro and end with a brief conclusion that restates it. Use topic sentences to link each paragraph to the view.
content
Add one or two more concrete examples and explain how they support the point. Tie each example back to the main argument.
core strength
Clear position and balanced discussion of both views.
coherence
Good linking phrases help flow from one idea to the next.
language
Some varied sentence forms show language range.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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