Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disgree with this opinion?

It is believed among people that
music
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is an effective way to bring individuals from various cultures and generations together. I totally agree with
this
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statement because
music
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can be played and enjoyed by anyone, regardless of their language, age, or nationality.
In addition
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, musicians can have a huge fanbase from all over the globe, all enjoying the same song.
First,
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playing
music
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is not limited to a certain age group, meaning that anyone interested in playing instruments can do so.
For example
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, a
music
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class may have a mix of learners — some are children,
while
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others could be employees or adults. Despite the huge age gap and the differences in experience between the two individuals, they are brought together by one factor
:
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:
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their love for
music
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.
Furthermore
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,
music
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artists attract fans from all over the world with the albums they release, which can turn into global sensations that connect people everywhere. In some cases,
music
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enthusiasts travel from different regions to join others in a shared space to see their favourite artist perform in concert. In conclusion, something as powerful and timeless as
music
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has the ability to unite people. It is an undeniable force that connects individuals of different ages and languages. An adult can teach a child how to play the piano, and that same child could one day become an artist performing for a diverse audience.

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task response
Your view is clear and you take one side. Try to add more ideas to show more view.
coherence
Link your ideas with easy words like and, also, but, so to make flow smooth.
language
Check grammar and use short, simple sentences. Use plain words.
strength
Clear stance on the topic
strength
Well set out with intro, body, and conclusion
strength
Examples show a link to music from different places
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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