IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The three tables illustrate how the number of
reseidents
Correct your spelling
residents
 changed
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 New York City and its five
districts
Check wording
boroughs
show examples
: Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island in the
years
Use synonyms
 1800, 1900, and 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, the city experienced a significant growth
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 population, in which more and more people moved into
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 five districts
in
Change preposition
during
show examples
 that period of time.
However
Linking Words
, the proportion of
residents
Use synonyms
 living in
Manhanttan
Correct your spelling
Manhattan
 and the other places
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 varied in the two centuries.More precisely, there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 originally 79216 people living in New York City in 1800 before a considerable
rose
Replace the word
rise
show examples
 to 3437202 in 1900, and the number
even
Rephrase
apply
show examples
dubled
Correct your spelling
doubled
 up in 2000. The
years
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 witnessed the
residents
Use synonyms
had relocated
Wrong verb form
relocating
show examples
 to other urban areas over time, from just about
three quater
Correct your spelling
three-quarters
 to less than a
quater
Correct your spelling
quarter
 in
Manhanttan
Correct your spelling
Manhattan
, the pattern really shifted these
years
Use synonyms
. Manhattan district contributed 60515 people
while
Linking Words
 the other
districted
Replace the word
districts
show examples
 only contributed 18701 in 1800, but after approximately five million
residents
Use synonyms
 moved
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island two hundred
years
Use synonyms
 later,
Manhatten
Use the right word
Manhattan
show examples
 lost its dominant position because after a growth in 1900, the
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of
residents
Use synonyms
 even dropped in 2000.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, residents with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "moved" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • people
  • city
  • five
  • district
  • grow
  • growth
  • rise
  • increase
  • increase
  • rise
  • fall
  • decline
  • high
  • low
  • big
  • large
  • small
  • more
  • less
  • over time
  • by year
  • in total
  • compare
  • compared with
  • whereas
  • trend
  • pattern
  • overall
  • feature
  • note
  • point
  • difference
  • lead
  • catch up
  • late
  • early
  • century
  • decade
  • period
  • 2000
  • 1800
  • 1900
  • continuous
  • steady
  • rapid
  • fast
  • slow
  • periods
  • numbers
  • data
  • report
  • describe
  • summarise
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