IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

transport delays and long journey times are a widespread phenomenon in many cities today. what are the causes of this problem, and how could the situation be improved?

As we can say that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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time
Use synonyms
 is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one
Use synonyms
 of the most important issues in human living; being late to somewhere is acceptable because of
not
Rephrase
apply
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scheduled
Use the right word
unscheduled
show examples
 delays and long duration of voyages in a lot of cities today. Here we can talk about the choices of
people
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 live in an urban
.
Check wording
area.
show examples
 Of course to we can talk about lots of factors that
acts
Correct subject-verb agreement
act
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 as a delation. Especially in crowded , big cities
Use synonyms
people
Punctuation problem
, people
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 prefer to use public
transportation
Use synonyms
 to get somewhere at
the
Correct article usage
apply
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any
time
Use synonyms
 of day. So because of the demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, the responsibility of
capable
Correct article usage
the capable
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 will be low.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the technology that governments use in public
transportation
Use synonyms
 is no
more
Rephrase
longer
show examples
 efficient, so a renovation will make a better process in
the duration
Check wording
terms
show examples
 of getting somewhere. It's a good policy to support public transport for
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 and
also
Linking Words
saving
Wrong verb form
to save
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time
Use synonyms
; by the way, the
transportation
Use synonyms
 systems must be taken to a good position for all. To save
time
Use synonyms
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
 whistles that
used
Verb problem
are used
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 for public
transportation
Use synonyms
 must be developed to a safer and rapid position. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
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example, the Japanese train system named Shinkansen has a high velocity rate that the train yet from
one
Use synonyms
 to
an other
Use the right word
another
show examples
 in minutes. So a lot of
people
Use synonyms
prefers
Correct subject-verb agreement
prefer
show examples
this
Linking Words
 system to get from
one
Use synonyms
 place to another in a rapid way. It can be a good example to all countries as a giving idea. As a conclusion in
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
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 world, the interaction between countries and
people
Use synonyms
are
Verb problem
apply
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depends on high levels.
People
Use synonyms
 get in touch with others in many ways .Travelling from
one
Use synonyms
 place to another always
serve
Correct subject-verb agreement
serves
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
apply
show examples
to get in touch with each other to make a journey to go home or work. As we see, we are spending a lot of
time
Use synonyms
 in public transport for a reason
.. if
Punctuation problem
. If
show examples
 difficult do cycling can be another choice
for
Change preposition
to
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breathe
Verb problem
reduce
show examples
 travelling times.

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content
Add a short plan at the start and a clear end.
organization
Make one idea per paragraph with a clear topic sentence.
cohesion
Use link words to show order and to add ideas.
grammar
Fix wrong words and spelling; keep grammar simple.
examples
Give one or two strong examples that fit the point.
content strength
It shows a real point about delay and the use of transport.
example strength
Shinkansen example gives a real case.
tone strength
The tone shows a wish to fix the issue with plan.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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