Professional workers like doctors, nurses and teachers make a greater contribution to society and so should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is no denying the fact that jobs
such
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as doctors, nurses, and teachers are essential in every country.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that they should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities, there is
also
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an argument that opposes
this
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view. In my opinion, I believe it is crucial to respect professional workers in every possible way, including giving them the salary they deserve.
To begin
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with, these professionals have a great impact on many aspects of our lives.
In other words
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,
such
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jobs are significant because they take care of our health and educate our children.
In addition
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, paying them more money can make them feel proud of their sensitive and important work.
For example
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, mistakes in sports can be accepted, but it is impossible to accept mistakes from doctors. Another point to consider is that they study hard and deal with complex problems. People in these fields face various challenges and difficulties, so we must respect and support them for their efforts.
Moreover
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, to make our future safe and successful, we need to encourage these professions.
For instance
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, if our children see that athletes are paid much more, they may not be motivated to pursue
such
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essential careers. In conclusion, despite people having different opinions, I believe that professional workers should receive higher salaries and greater respect from both society and governments.

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task response
State a clear view at once and keep it through the essay.
task response
Add one or two more strong reasons and a simple counter view with a brief reply.
coherence
Use linking words to show how ideas fit together, like first, also, but, finally.
coherence
Make sure each paragraph has a top line that tells its main point.
grammar
Check grammar marks and use simple sentences with correct form.
lexical
Give a real example or two that show how pay can help society.
content
The essay shows a clear view and a simple plan.
structure
It has a start, body parts, and a conclusion.
style
The language is easy to read and easy to follow.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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