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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unnecessary or even negative. Discuss the possible argument on both sides, and say which side you personally support.

some
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Some
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 people argue that
children
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 should spend all their free
time
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 with families,
while
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 others believe that
this
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 is unnecessary or even harmful.
Although
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 both views have some merit, I personally believe that spending most of their free
time
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 with parents is highly beneficial for
children
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's emotional and social development. On the one hand,
Spending
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spending
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 all of one's free
time
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 with family may limit
child's
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a child's
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 independence and social skills.
Children
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 need to explore the world, interact with friends, and learn to make their own decisions.
For instance
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, playing
sport
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sports
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,
joing
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joining
club
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a club
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, or simply spending
time
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 with peers can teach them teamwork, problem-solving, and communication skills that they might
acquier
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acquire
 at home.
Therefore
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, giving
children
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 some freedom to spend
time
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 outside the family circle helps them become more confident and self-reliant.
On the other hand
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, spending leisure
time
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 with family provides
children
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 with emotional support and helps strengthen family bonds. When parents regularly talk and engage with their
children
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, they can better understand their needs,
quide
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guide
 their behaviour, and build trust.
For example
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, research from the New York Times suggests that
children
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 who spend more quality
time
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 with families tend to develop stronger communication skills and higher self-esteem.
In addition
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, family interactions provide valuable opportunities for kids to learn moral values, respect, and empathy-qualities that are essential for personal growth. In conclusion,
while
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 some independence is necessary for
kid's
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kids'
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 development, I firmly believe that spending most of their leisure
time
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 with their families is more significant and beneficial in the long run. It not only enhances communication and emotional stability but
also
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provides
Verb problem
helps
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 kids grow into well-rounded and confident individuals.

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grammar
Fix grammar and spelling so ideas are clear.
development
Give more detail for each main idea and show how your point links to the topic.
style
Use plain, correct words and avoid long, hard phrases.
grammar
Check plural forms, articles, and word order to make sense.
strength
Clear view on the topic.
structure
Good layout with intro, body, and ending.
content
Some good examples to back up points.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • strengthen family bonds
  • emotional support
  • instill values
  • nurturing environment
  • secure and loved
  • social skills
  • independence
  • sense of identity
  • diverse environments
  • adaptable
  • open-minded
  • balanced development
  • foundational support
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