IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend.Do you agree or disagree？

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Introduction
There is a common recognition that it is better for workers to shorten the working
week
Punctuation problem
week,
show examples
while
Linking Words
 the weekend should be extended.
Body · 1
From my perspective，I don't agree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion that people must have more holiday
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
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 in their daily week.
Excepting
Wrong verb form
Except for
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 the weekend ，we
also
Linking Words
 have lots of long
holiday
Fix the agreement mistake
holidays
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，just like
，
Punctuation problem
apply
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Christmas
Use synonyms
Days
Fix the agreement mistake
Day
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 and lots of traditional
memory holidays
Check wording
holiday memories
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.So，we actually have many time to relax
ourselves
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Body · 2
Actually,in the real working environment,staff must
to
Verb problem
apply
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finish a complete
processes
Fix the agreement mistake
process
show examples
 program ,sometimes
also
Linking Words
 must finish it with
the group
Check wording
their
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 friends.If they have
long
Correct article usage
a long
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 weekend in
this
Linking Words
 finishing period，
for example
Linking Words
 ，work for 4
days
Use synonyms
 and rest for 3
days
Use synonyms
.
Body · 3
I
Verb problem
I'm
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 afraid that they will forget the details and lose the working
statues
Check wording
statistics
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.
Therefore
Linking Words
，I consider
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
having 5
days
Use synonyms
 and 2
days
Use synonyms
 rest
is
Wrong verb form
to be
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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scientific management.
Body · 4
Every
coins
Fix the agreement mistake
coin
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 has two sides
，
Punctuation problem
;
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in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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actually
Replace the word
actual
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circumstance
Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
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，some bosses will demand their employees to work overtime without any compensation.
Conclusion
So every
laborer
Change the spelling
labourer
show examples
 should keep in mind the self-claim
:
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
to have adequate rest time.

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task response
Your view is clear, but you should state it in the first paragraph and add two or three strong reasons.
coherence
Improve flow by using simple linking words and a clear paragraph order. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence and finish with a short conclusion.
stance
You show a clear stance against more holidays.
content
You give some reasons or facts to support your view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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