IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

People should work a fixed number of hours per week and employers should not ask anybody to work extra hours. discuss both of views and give your opinion.

In modern workplaces, there is an ongoing debate about whether
employes
Use the right word
employees
show examples
 should
work
Use synonyms
 a fixed number of
hours
Use synonyms
 per week or be required
Use synonyms
work
Verb problem
to work
show examples
overtime
Use synonyms
 when necessary. Personally, I believe that working limits with occasional
overtime
Use synonyms
 with fair compensation, ensuring both worker well-being and
organizational
Change the spelling
organisational
show examples
 efficiency. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, setting a fixed number of
hours
Use synonyms
 has several advantages.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it ensures employees maintain a
Use synonyms
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
work
Use synonyms
-life balance.
As working
Change preposition
Working
show examples
overtime
Use synonyms
 often causes stress, fatigue, and serious
health
Use synonyms
 issues like depression and heart failure.
For example
Linking Words
, research shows that people who
work
Use synonyms
 more than fifty
hours
Use synonyms
 a week are more likely to experience burnout and reduced productivity.
Secondly
Linking Words
, having
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
limited
hours
Use synonyms
 allows staff members to pursue their personal interests, which improves their happiness and
overall
Linking Words
 job satisfaction.
Thus
Linking Words
, restricting additional working
hours
Use synonyms
 benefits both individuals and society.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some flexibility is necessary in certain professions. Industries like healthcare, transportation, and technology face
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
unexpected emergencies, where young workers may need to stay additional
hours
Use synonyms
 to handle emergencies or meet deadlines.
For instance
Linking Words
, during hospital crises or new product launches,
overtime
Use synonyms
 becomes inevitable.
Moreover
Linking Words
, some
health
Use synonyms
 workers voluntarily choose to
work
Use synonyms
 long
hours
Use synonyms
 to earn extra income or gain professional experience. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 fixed working
hours
Use synonyms
 promotes better
health
Use synonyms
 and balance, completely banning
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overtime
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 is unrealistic. In my opinion, the best approach is
defining
Wrong verb form
to define
show examples
 clear
work
Use synonyms
 limits with fair-paid
overtime
Use synonyms
balance
Punctuation problem
, balance
show examples
 staff well-being and workplace performance.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Have a clear plan: start with a short map of your idea. Then give two side views and a clear view in the end.
coherence
Use linking words to move from one idea to the next. Words like first, also, but, finally help a lot.
grammar
Fix grammar basics: subject-verb match, correct articles, and use full sentences.
examples
Give one or two exact details or numbers for the examples. This makes your point stronger.
style
Keep sentences simple and cut long lines. Short, clear notes are easier to read.
content
Good balance of view and opinion.
coherence
Clear use of on the one hand/on the other hand to show both sides.
content
Examples like burnout and hospital crisis show real life.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: