IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below gives information about cinema attendance in Australia between 1990 and the present, with projections to 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below gives information about cinema attendance in Australia between 1990 and the present, with projections to 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The line chart
illustrate
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrates
show examples
 the information about the people who visit cinemas in Australia in two
decads
Use the right word
decades
show examples
 from 1990 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,it can be clearly seen that the chart showed an upward trend,the number of
visiters
Use the right word
visitors
show examples
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 over the years.
Linking Words
Similarly
Add a comma
Similarly,
show examples
 the teenagers and the young adults between 25 to 34
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 more interested
to go
Change preposition
in going
show examples
 to
cinema
Correct article usage
the cinema
show examples
 except
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 years from 2006 to 2010.
However
Linking Words
, their beginning point
startesd
Correct your spelling
started
 at 60% and reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
80% in 2006.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, 35 to 49 years old folks, their
cinemas
Fix the agreement mistake
cinema
show examples
 concept was 60 % in 1990
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it started
gradually
Verb problem
to gradually
show examples
 increase
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 85% in 2010.
Moreover
Linking Words
, individuals over 50
also
Linking Words
 showed
at
Use the right word
an
show examples
 upward trend
to visit
Change preposition
in visiting
show examples
Correct article usage
the theater
show examples
theater
Change the spelling
theatre
show examples
 over two
decads
Use the right word
decades
show examples
. Eventually, the teenagers had the highest proportion in cinema attendance.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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