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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows the percentage of journeys made by different forms of transport in four countries, The bar graph shows the results of a survey into car use in Canada. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table shows the percentage of journeys made by different forms of transport in four countries, The bar graph shows the results of a survey into car use in Canada. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The table represents information on
proportion
Correct article usage
the proportion
show examples
 of trip transports from
Canada
Use synonyms
,
Belgium
Use synonyms
, Germany and
Correct article usage
the Netherland
show examples
Netherland
Fix the agreement mistake
Netherlands
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 The bar chart
display
Correct subject-verb agreement
displays
show examples
car
Use synonyms
 usage investigation in
Canada
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the driving
car
Use synonyms
 was the highest item
than
Change preposition
among
show examples
 other devices, research
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
car
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
work nightshift
Check wording
night shifts
show examples
 was the
lower
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 percentage for all. 　The voyage of the
car
Use synonyms
 in
Canada
Use synonyms
 accounted for 90% , which was 1
times
Use synonyms
 more than
Correct article usage
the Netherland
show examples
Netherland
Fix the agreement mistake
Netherlands
show examples
 and just over 18% than that of
Belgium
Use synonyms
.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
bick
Correct your spelling
bike
 usage from
Belgium
Use synonyms
 and Germany reached the same level of 2% and was one-fifth in four countries, which was 14
times
Use synonyms
 less than that of
Correct article usage
the Netherland
show examples
Netherland
Fix the agreement mistake
Netherlands
show examples
. The trip by public transport
Germany
Change preposition
in Germany
show examples
 constituted 18% in
this
Linking Words
 program, which was just over 6% than
Belgium
Use synonyms
 and 6
times
Use synonyms
 more than
Canada
Use synonyms
.Being on foot or other tool for the journey in
Canada
Use synonyms
 was the lowest consumption of 5% and 1%, respectively. The bar graphs provided the
car
Use synonyms
 utilize questionnaire in
Canada
Use synonyms
. Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people think that it was not adjusted percentage of around 38%, which was just more
8
Change preposition
than 8
show examples
% than
need
Replace the word
needed
show examples
 for
work
Use synonyms
 and 1.7
times
Use synonyms
 more than convenient. Following that, the need for
work
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 investigation occupied approximately 30% , which was 2.5
times
Use synonyms
 more than quicker and was the second highest
results
Fix the agreement mistake
result
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 survey. Notably,
Use synonyms
work
Correct article usage
the work
show examples
nightshift
Use the right word
night shift
show examples
 was about 8% and just lower 4% than
quicker
Correct article usage
the quicker
show examples
, which
Correct pronoun usage
one, which
show examples
 was
making
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a 1 to 4
different
Replace the word
difference
show examples
 compared to other results.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words canada, belgium, car, work, times with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just over" was used 2 times.
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