IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The gap between the rich and the poor is increasing wide, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause? What are the solutions to address those problems?

Nowadays,the gap between the rich and poor is
widenig
Correct your spelling
widening
 across the world
has
Correct word choice
and has
show examples
 become a serious issue in many parts of the world.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the main problems that
this
Linking Words
 growing inequality can cause and will
also
Linking Words
 suggest some possible solutions to reduce it. The major problem caused by
this
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 situation is social instability.When the wealthy
contunie
Correct your spelling
continue
 to accumulate more resources
while
Linking Words
 the poor struggle to survive, feelings of injustice and resentment increase among the
lower income
Use the right word
lower-income
show examples
 population.
This
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 can lead to protests, crimes, or even political unrest, as
people
Use synonyms
 demand fair treatment.Another issue is the lack of equal opportunities.Children from poor families often can not afford
good
Correct article usage
a good
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 education or healthcare, which limits their chances for
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 future and traps them in a cycle of poverty. To solve these
problems
Punctuation problem
problems,
show examples
 the government should take action.
First,
Linking Words
they can make rich
people
Use synonyms
 pay more taxes and use
this
Linking Words
 money to help poor
people
Use synonyms
.
Second,
Linking Words
the government should give free education and healthcare
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 poor
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
is help
Wrong verb form
helps
show examples
 children have a better future and find good jobs.
Also
Linking Words
, companies can create more jobs for poor
people
Use synonyms
 so they can earn money and live better. In conclusion, the big gap between rich and poor
people
Use synonyms
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 many problems like crime and
no
Rephrase
apply
show examples
equal
Use the right word
unequal
show examples
 chances. But if the government and companies help poor
people
Use synonyms
 with money, jobs, and education,
this
Linking Words
 problem can get smaller.Everyone should have a fair life and the same opportunities.

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planning
Plan first. Make a short plan before you write. State the problem, then the plan to fix it.
content
Use more exact ideas. Give one or two clear examples of how money, education, and work can help.
coherence
Use linking words to move from idea to idea. Start with First, Then, Finally. Tie ideas in each part.
language
Check spelling and grammar. Make sentences clear and not too long.
content
The essay has a clear idea that the gap can cause problems.
structure
There is a simple structure: intro, body, and conclusion.
content
It mentions both problems and ways to fix them.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap
  • rich
  • poor
  • money
  • income
  • education
  • school
  • health
  • housing
  • job
  • wage
  • tax
  • government
  • policy
  • invest
  • spend
  • growth
  • crime
  • move up
  • equal
  • fair
  • opportunity
  • access
  • community
  • business
  • training
  • loan
  • program
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