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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people feel that we should protect all wild animals. Other people think that only some wild animals should be protected. Discuss both points of view and give your opinon.

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Introduction
All wild animals
are needed
Wrong verb form
need
show examples
 to be preserved. Many people support
this
Linking Words
 thought, whilst
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 there are a few opponents as well. I am totally in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of saving all the animal
species
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will delineate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
both aspects of the given statement.
Body paragraph 1
There are several reasons to support the argument. The paramount one is, beauty of
uniqueness
Correct article usage
the uniqueness
show examples
 of an animal
species
Use synonyms
,
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is
reknowed
Correct your spelling
recognised
 in a particular region of
Correct article usage
the earth
show examples
earth
Fix capitalization
Earth
show examples
. In Canada,
for instance
Linking Words
,
moose
Correct article usage
the moose
show examples
 is
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 iconic animal
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that is
Linking Words
 native to the country. Anyone
Correct pronoun usage
who think
show examples
think
Correct subject-verb agreement
thinks
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 of Canada, the first animal instinct they get is a moose.
Body paragraph 2
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
human
Add a comma
human,
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 we do not have the right to judge over lives of other living beings
even
Punctuation problem
, even
show examples
 if it animals. The best quality a human has is humanity, and if there are some
innitiatives
Correct your spelling
initiatives
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 that have been taken by
govenments
Correct your spelling
governments
 of
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 should be for all the wild categories of animals. In the year 2024,
for instance
Linking Words
, a protest was
done
Verb problem
held
show examples
 in Austria, by the natives, against
ruling
Correct article usage
the ruling
show examples
 government, when the higher authorities of the country
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 left the native
pollar
Correct your spelling
polar
 bears to
suffuer
Correct your spelling
suffer
 from a deadly infection. They were highly
criticized
Change the spelling
criticised
show examples
 by the population of the nation.
Body paragraph 3
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
 a few opinions
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 that do not agree with the protection of all the wild
species
Use synonyms
. The primary reason behind
can
Correct pronoun usage
this can
show examples
 be, requirement of funds. Almost
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 all the projects are granted some fund to put a plan into action, which decide how much area can be covered. An
artical
Correct your spelling
article
,
for instance
Linking Words
, was published in The Times, in which wildlife
researchs
Correct your spelling
researchers
 claimed
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 that they get limited funds each year, which
shrink
Correct subject-verb agreement
shrinks
show examples
 their research area.
Conclusion
To conclude
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 there
a
Verb problem
are a
show examples
few reasons
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 that put
limitation
Fix the agreement mistake
limitations
show examples
 on the number of wild
species
Use synonyms
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 be protected,
however
Linking Words
, I believe
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 every living being has an equal right to live, as many of them present their uniqueness, and are rare.

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structure
Plan an outline before you write. A short intro, 2 body parts and a clear end.
coherence
Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and use links to show how ideas go together.
language
Check spelling and grammar. Fix common errors so the text is easy to read.
language
Use simple and exact words. Do not use long, hard phrases.
content
Your view is clear and you say it.
structure
You use linking words to show a contrast and flow.
examples
You give examples to support ideas, even if not perfect.
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