At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

There is no doubt the fact that in many countries today, the percentages of young
adults
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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higher than the percentages of older people.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that
this
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situation has many advantages for these societies and the government, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it.
This
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essay will discuss both points of view , and I will express my opinion. On the one hand, the rising
number
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of young
adults
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has a lot of benefits.
Firstly
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, they can do physically demanding jobs.
Second,
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adults
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are more familiar with new technology that will make life easier.
Third,
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the government can benefit from them to improve the economic situation by hiring them.
Finally
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, they can help older people or kids with their work or study.
On the other hand
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,
this
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case has some drawbacks,
for instance
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, the government must provide the largest
number
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of jobs to prevent unemployment. It is possible to say that a decrease in the
number
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of educational or working
adults
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may increase in the
number
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of crimes and social problems.
Moreover
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, some older people will lose their jobs depending on their companies replace them with younger individuals. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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question. On balance,
however
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, I tend to believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages .
Overall
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, an increased
number
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of teenagers will improve the country's state from different sides. They are stronger, supportive, and have high energy to do many things.

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Task Response
Explain each idea better. Give real reasons for your points.
Grammar
Fix grammar and word form. Use are with plural subjects, and check verb tense.
Coherence
Keep one idea per paragraph. Use linking words to show contrast and add ideas well.
Structure
End with a clear view. State if you think the good side is bigger or not.
Structure
The plan uses a two-sided view.
Coherence
Link words like on the one hand and on the other hand.
Content
The idea of a young work force is shown.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographic
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • innovation
  • skilled labor
  • social development
  • technology
  • dividend
  • competition
  • resources
  • social welfare
  • unrest
  • instability
  • healthcare
  • elderly care
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