New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Recently, modern internet devices have altered how young people spend their leisure
time
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.
Although
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this
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trend offers several notable
benefits
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.
Although
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this
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trend offers certain
benefits
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,I believe that its drawbacks outweigh the advantages .
To begin
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with,the primary advantage of
increase
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increased
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technology use among
children
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is the significant improvement it brings to their learning experience, especially when digital tools are used for educational purposes.
This
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stems from the fact that many digital platforms offer interactive lessons,games, and learning apps
which
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, which
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help
children
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develop new skills in an engaging way.
For instance
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,
children
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can use educational apps,
such
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as
mathematic
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math
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games and language-learning programs,during their free
time
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,which makes studying enjoyable and accessible from anywhere.
Consequently
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,technology can support their intellectual
development
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and enhance their academic performance.
However
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,despite these
benefits
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, increased technology use can
also
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result in several negative consequences for
children
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, particularly concerning their health and social
development
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.
This
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can be attributed to
children
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who spend long hours on internet devices often
become
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becoming
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physically inactive, which increases the risk of obesity, poor posture and eye strain.
For instance
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,numerous individuals prefer playing online games rather than spending
time
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outdoors or interacting with their peers,which reduces opportunities for real-life communication.
Therefore
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,excessive screen
time
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could negatively affect
children
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’s
overall
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well-being and hinder their social
development
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. In conclusion,
although
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modern internet devices offer certain
benefits
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for
children
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’s academic
development
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, there are several disadvantages which affects negatively for
children
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’s mental health.From
given
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the given
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examples above, I stand for that
disadvantages
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the disadvantages
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exceed the advantages.

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structure
Make a plan: start with a short intro that says your view. Then two body paragraphs, one for each side. End with a clear conclusion.
coherence
Link ideas with simple words. Use 'first', 'also', 'but', 'however', 'as a result' to join sentences.
grammar
Fix grammar and spell. Use short sentences. Avoid long sentences that go on.
content
Use more exact examples. Talk about real life, health, and age.
content
Clear view that the drawbacks outnumber the benefits
language use
Some good use of linking words like 'However' and 'For instance'
structure
Presents both sides, then gives a conclusion
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • new technologies
  • children
  • free time
  • access
  • educational resources
  • information
  • development
  • key skills
  • enhancing
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • opportunity
  • connect
  • convenience
  • flexibility
  • lack
  • physical activity
  • potential
  • health issues
  • impact
  • social
  • emotional development
  • exposure
  • inappropriate content
  • addiction
  • dependency
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