IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

The way
of
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apply
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people
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interacting
Wrong verb form
interact
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 with each other has drastically changed these days as modern
technology
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 is
letting
Verb problem
allowing
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people
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 to communicate through social
media
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. It has benefited
to
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apply
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the
people
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 who live far from their loved ones,
while
Linking Words
 many fraud and fake relationships are growing day by day and losing the ability to talk to real
people
Use synonyms
. I think there are more negative
development
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developments
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 than positive
development
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developments
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. Many
people
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 are being
victim
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victims
show examples
 of fraud because of social
media
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 by talking to
the
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apply
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strangers. It is a harsh reality
but
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, but
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people
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 try to make new
friends
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 online
than
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rather than
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 depending on
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 real
friends
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 these days. The same online friend with their fake mask on social
media
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cheat
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cheats
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people
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 with their life
emotionally
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, emotionally
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 and financially
which
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, which
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 is one of the worst
effect
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effects
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 done to society. Most
people
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 are getting addicted to these new technologies.
For example
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, recently AI has taken over all the technological
field
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fields
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,
people
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 talk about their
emotion
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emotions
show examples
 with AI rather than real
friends
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. In one way, it is good for some of us
but
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, but
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 in
reality
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reality,
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 it is distancing
people
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with
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from
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 real
friends
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 they are losing their ability to interact in real society. There are some positive development done by
technology
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 as some
people
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 rely on social
media
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 who are doing long distance with their family and
friends
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. They are able to talk to their loved ones by chatting and video calls. It was a problem back
then
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 when
people
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 needed to wait for
a
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apply
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months for calls because most
people
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 didn’t have their own mobile. In conclusion, I think it has eradicated the problem of
people
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 staying far from home
due to
Linking Words
 modern
technology
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, but a huge drawback
are
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is
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 increasing with more developed
technology
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as
Punctuation problem
, as
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 many
people
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 ruined their
life
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lives
show examples
 because of the fake
relationship
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relationships
show examples
 they built online.

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structure
Make a clear plan before you write. Start with a simple idea that you will show in the essay.
development
In each paragraph give one main idea and one clear example.
cohesion
Use easy link words like and, but, also, so to move from one idea to next.
grammar
Check your grammar. Use the right form of be, have, do and keep tense the same in each sentence.
stance
You give a view that negatives are bigger and you show both sides.
idea
You touch on a real issue like long distance talk and online fraud.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technology
  • interact
  • relationships
  • connectivity
  • communication
  • online
  • face-to-face
  • friendships
  • romantic relationships
  • family dynamics
  • positive
  • negative
  • development
  • effects
  • formation
  • ease
  • impacts
  • communities
  • connect
  • interaction
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