IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The car is a disastrous 20th Century invention that has made the world’s cities more dangerous and polluted, as well as being responsible for the deaths of millions of people in accidents. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that
invention
Correct article usage
the invention
show examples
 of
cars
Use synonyms
 is a terrible mistake, which leads to a mass of issues, like environmental problems. But in my opinion, despite
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
 arguments
Use synonyms
cars
Punctuation problem
, cars
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still
Verb problem
are still
show examples
 an indispensable part of daily life,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 helps people in many different spheres. What makes
cars
Use synonyms
 absolutely
uniqe
Correct your spelling
unique
 in
compare
Replace the word
comparison
show examples
 with other vehicles is that they
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
can be
utilased
Correct your spelling
utilised
 for private use, unlike buses, ships, planes, etc. And they
also
Linking Words
 have the level of comfort and endurance that can not be provided by bikes or scooters. Because of that
Use synonyms
cars
Punctuation problem
, cars
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 became
Correct article usage
a universal
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universal
Replace the word
universally
show examples
 necessary thing,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 helps individuals with daily tasks, and, what
more
Verb problem
is more
show examples
 important, can be used in emergencies.
For instance
Linking Words
, a person who lives far from work or university can use a car of
one
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 own to
incomote
Correct your spelling
commute
 from work. So that person will not need to change
a
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 place of living or share personal space with strangers every day.
Besides
Linking Words
of
Change preposition
apply
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that, in some unexpected circumstances,
such
Linking Words
 as
flood
Correct article usage
a flood
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 or
storm
Correct article usage
a storm
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 in the city,
cars
Use synonyms
 would be a great solution for escape.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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i
Fix capitalization
I
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 can agree that
cars
Use synonyms
 can have their disadvantages,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that
Correct article usage
the affect
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affect
Use the right word
effects
show examples
 of those can be mitigated, which is already happening.
For example
Linking Words
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
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, science society and
enterpruners
Correct your spelling
entrepreneurs
 work
hardly
Replace the word
hard
show examples
 to create eco-friendly versions. One of these is already existing -
electro
Use the right word
electric
show examples
cars
Use synonyms
. And though they have imperfections, like their batteries that have a negative impact on nature,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that with technological
progress
Punctuation problem
progress,
show examples
 mankind will create
cars
Use synonyms
 with minimal ecological side effects. All things considered,
cars
Use synonyms
 can have positive and negative
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
, like being a private vehicle or
affect badly
Wrong verb form
having a bad effect
show examples
 on
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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. But in my opinion, the first one
outweights
Correct your spelling
outweighs
 the second in many ways, and
cars
Use synonyms
 are
remarkable
Correct article usage
a remarkable
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 invention of
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 century.

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Task Response
Plan your writing. Start with your view in one line. Then give 2 or 3 clear reasons.
Task Response
Give one or two simple examples for each reason and keep them easy to read.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Use short sentences and proper grammar. Check noun and verb form.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make two or three clear parts: intro, 2 or 3 body parts, and a short ending.
Coherence and Cohesion
In each paragraph, start with a small idea line (topic sentence) and show how your idea connects to the main idea.
Content
The essay shows a view on cars and gives reasons.
Content
Some point about eco cars and use in daily life is present.
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