Some People believe that the best way to reduce commuting time is to replace parks and gardens near the city center with commuter apartment building, but other disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that converting public gardens into residential buildings is the best method to reduce travel hours.
However
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, others oppose
this
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view. I believe that it will help community people not to spend hours travelling and help ensure a work-life balance. Some think that transforming parks will shorten the commute. If the government builds apartments in the city centre, the distance between houses and offices will decrease, which helps the workforce to reach their offices quickly compared to buses or trains.
For example
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, Toronto Downtown has multiple residential buildings
as well as
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offices in the same blocks , which dramatically cuts the commute time by 50% in comparison to Brampton.
On the other hand
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, others argue that replacing parks is not the perfect solution. The reason is that not all of the working people can be accommodated in a few apartments.
Moreover
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, gardens are necessary for the community as they balance the stress among the working class.
For example
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, Japan has trails and water ponds near the working area so that employees can walk during
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
break , and
this
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will help increase their productivity.
To conclude
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, I strongly agree that converting public parks into large residential apartments will indeed reduce commuting hours , as in
this
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modern era , in-house plants do help with stress-related issues.

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structure
Plan before you write: start with your view in the intro, then two body parts for each side, then finish with a clear conclusion that repeats your view.
development
Give clear, real examples or data to back your main ideas so the reader can see proof.
linking
Use clear links to join ideas: use words like first, on the one hand, on the other hand, also, but.
grammar
Check grammar and signs. Use periods and commas well; make verbs agree with their subjects.
strength
Clear view stated in the intro and in the conclusion.
strength
Two sides are shown.
strength
Some real places are used as examples to back ideas.
strength
Use of linking words helps flow in places.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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