IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.

University
students
Use synonyms
 regularly debate whether they should learn other
subjects
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 unrelated to their major
in addition
Linking Words
 to their main
subjects
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. Others think that they should only
focus
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 on the
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 necessary for their degree. Studying additional
subjects
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 not related to your career might be beneficial
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
on the contrary
Linking Words
,
Some
Fix capitalization
some
show examples
 individuals think they should only give attention to their
major related
Use the right word
major-related
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I will discuss both points and share my opinion. Having
non required
Use the right word
non-required
show examples
 extra
classes
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 can make the
students
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well rounded
Use the right word
well-rounded
show examples
. Studying business, computer science
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
such
Linking Words
 can develop
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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many skills that are useful in the labour market.
For
Linking Words
instance
Add a comma
instance,
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 a person who studies chemistry and medicine as their main major and takes additional
classes
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 in business economics can start a pharmacy company in the future.
Therefore
Linking Words
, studying outside their major improves the
individuals
Check wording
individual's
show examples
 skill to work on different career paths
On the other hand
Linking Words
, fields which require immense training and knowledge can be quite hard to
focus
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 on
while
Linking Words
 taking other
subjects
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. Many
students
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 prefer to invest their time only in their
career oriented
Use the right word
career-oriented
show examples
 study
Linking Words
thus
Punctuation problem
, thus
show examples
 becoming professionals.
For example
Linking Words
, majoring in surgery requires at least 6 years of intense studying, making it impossible
for studying
Change preposition
to study
show examples
 other
subjects
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, many
students
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 seem to invest all their time in mastering their field. In summary, taking additional
classes
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 may become valuable for some
students
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contributing
Punctuation problem
, contributing
show examples
 to their skills.
In contrast
Linking Words
, demanding fields like engineering and surgery require
focus
Use synonyms
 and time to become successful. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 individuals should invest their
focus
Use synonyms
 on their core major and take complementary
classes
Use synonyms
 if possible.

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task
Your plan is clear and you present both sides with a view. Improve by adding a stronger final view and a longer, clearer link between ideas.
coherence
Make each paragraph start with a simple topic sentence. Use small linking words to show flow between sentences.
grammar
Use only simple common words. Fix small grammar and word choice mistakes, like not vs. not required, 'many useful skills' instead of 'you many skills.', and 'individuals' skills' for possessive.
content
Add more real and clear examples from real study or life to show how extra subjects can help.
organization
The essay shows a plan: intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
content
The writer gives both sides and a personal view.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
What to do next:
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