IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You ordered an item from an online shop three weeks ago. The shop said you would get the item two days later but you have not received it yet. Last week you sent an email about the situation to the shop, but you did not receive a reply. Write a letter to the manager. In your letter •explain the situation •complain about the bad service •ask for immediate delivery of your order or your money back You should write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

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Dear Sir/Madam I am writing to follow up
an
Change preposition
on an

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 email sent on 20th Sep 2024 under the subject of missing order # 216521 placed on 10th Sep 2024. I placed an internet order via your website to purchase a phone case a few weeks ago for $300.00. As per the sales agreement, the package is to be received within 2 working days but
not
Add a missing verb
has not

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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 been delivered to my address yet. Since the process
getting
Verb problem
was

There may be a verb use issue here.

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 delayed, I sent an email to your customer service department to get an update about it. Unfortunately, I have not received any response yet. In fact, I am totally disappointed about the poor customer service rendered to me and would like to bring
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 to your product distribution manager's attention
hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 a response has not been sent yet from the relevant department for my email. I would like to request a refund of full payment or
a
Correct article usage
an

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 immediate delivery of the product because I will not be available at home during next week
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 reporting for a special meeting in another province. I look forward to
hear
Change the verb form
hearing

The verb hear is usually in the gerund form when following the word look forward to. Consider replacing it with the -ing form.

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 from you. Yours faithfully Aravinda

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task achievement
You did a great job explaining the situation clearly. For an even higher score, make sure to provide specific dates and order numbers, which help in adding credibility to your complaint.
coherence cohesion
In terms of coherence and cohesion, try to use a variety of sentence structures to maintain the reader's interest. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph addresses a single idea to improve readability.
task achievement
The tone of your letter is appropriate and suits the purpose of the task well. This shows a good command over formal writing, which is excellent for your score.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are correctly formatted and professional, providing a smooth start and finish to your letter.
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