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Writing Samples
Band 5

In the modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with others through the internet. But others are against it. Do you think this is a positive trend or a negative trend?

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Internet
Correct article usage
The Internet
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 plays an indispensable role in everyone's life. Nowadays, it has become easy to sell, buy or work with others on the
internet
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.
However
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 , some
people
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 are against
this
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 trend because of the cheap availability of
products
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, scams and frauds, and misrepresentation of distinct
products
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. I think it is positive if
individuals
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 follow safety rules. I believe
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internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 provides a wider choice of
products
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 , easily accessible, lower prices, and flexibility of hours. One of the main reasons why I support the online platform is the wide variety of
products
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 is on the
internet
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.
People
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 can buy everything on it by simply searching for the product on the
internet
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.
For instance
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 , Lululemon , Ardene and Guess are selling brand clothes at discounted
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price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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,
whereas
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 Costco, Walmart , and GoDepot are grocery apps. By using these apps,
people
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 can not only save their time and money but
also
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 avoid the hassle of shopping in different aisles.
Moreover
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 , the lower
price
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 of gadgets, vehicles, and clothes encourages
customers
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 to shop
,
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apply
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and compare their
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price
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prices
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 with their competitors as well.
Furthermore
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 , most
people
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 love to spend their time with their family members, but sometimes, they have to leave their families behind to become successful. But nowadays, remote work is gaining popularity because it provides flexibility in hours. And they do not need to travel, and can manage and attend the meetings
while
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 sitting at home.
Although
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 the
internet
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 proves to be a boon for
individuals
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, the negative side can not be ignored. The majority of
people
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 love to do window shopping because they never rely on the quality of the
products
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 on the
internet
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.
Also
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 , some
sites
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 offer lower
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price
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prices
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 on
products
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, just to get the attention of
customers
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, and sell poor quality to them. Another is that most
sites
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 are fake, and they are used only by fraudsters to leak the privacy of
customers
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.
For instance
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, some
sites
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 send messages to them via email, and when
individuals
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 click on them,
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then
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apply
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they lose money from their bank accounts.
Consequently
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 , these
sites
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 are made only for manipulating the
customers
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 by showing misrepresentations on their websites. In conclusion,
while
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 the
internet
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 does pose risks
such
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 as fraud and misrepresentation, its advantages in terms of accessibility, affordability, and flexibility are far more significant. By remaining cautious and following safety measures,
individuals
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 can maximise the benefits of online platforms and minimise the drawbacks.

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task response
Answer the task with a clear view. State if you think the trend is positive or negative, and include a short reason in the end.
coherence
Use clear links between ideas. Start a new paragraph for each big idea and use simple join words like also, but, so, because.
content
Give more facts or real show to back each point. Tie every example to the task.
grammar
Watch grammar and punctuation. Use simple sentences and fix comma use.
structure
Follow a simple plan: intro, 2–3 body paragraphs, short conclusion.
lexical resource
Choose common words and keep phrases short.
stance
The writer shows a clear view that online life has its good sides and bad sides.
examples
Examples are used to back up points.
organization
Idea flow moves in a logical order from intro to conclusion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • internet
  • online
  • buy
  • sell
  • work
  • easy
  • fast
  • price
  • money
  • people
  • many
  • market
  • choice
  • shop
  • site
  • safe
  • risk
  • scam
  • fraud
  • privacy
  • data
  • rule
  • law
  • trust
  • skill
  • education
  • job
  • business
  • delivery
  • time
  • space
  • global
  • grow
  • learn
  • consumer
  • buyer
  • seller
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