IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Its
Use the right word
It's
show examples
common
Correct article usage
a common
show examples
 trend around the globe that
Use synonyms
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
show examples
 are shifting to the big
cities
Use synonyms
, thereby decreasing the citizens living in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 are moving to the big towns in search
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 a job
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 have a better life. I think
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 a negative development for the big
cities
Use synonyms
 as
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
finding
Wrong verb form
finds
show examples
 it hard
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
proving
Verb problem
provide
show examples
 basic facilities to the citizens. Because of the infrastructure needed, only developed in big
cities
Use synonyms
, the majority of the
factories
Use synonyms
 are situated there. More
factories
Use synonyms
means
Correct subject-verb agreement
mean
show examples
 more employment opportunities in big
cities
Use synonyms
. So,
people
Use synonyms
 have a better chance
to find
Change preposition
of finding
show examples
 a job in big
cities
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Bangladesh majority of
garments
Fix the agreement mistake
garment
show examples
factories
Use synonyms
 are established in Dhaka, Gazipur, Narayanganj,
Manikganj
Correct word choice
and Manikganj
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
. This
show examples
this
Linking Words
resulted
Verb problem
has resulted
show examples
 the
people
Use synonyms
to
Verb problem
moving to
show examples
move
Verb problem
apply
show examples
these
cities
Use synonyms
, making these
cities
Use synonyms
 among the densely populated towns in the world. Over 20 million
people
Use synonyms
 lived in Dhaka, creating difficulties for the government authorities in
proving
Verb problem
providing
show examples
 basic facilities, like
food
Use synonyms
, shelter, education, better sanitation, better environment,
provide
Wrong verb form
and providing
show examples
 safety to the residents, etc.
to
Punctuation problem
, to
show examples
 the incoming
population
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, I think when
people
Use synonyms
 move from
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
, it
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
Correct article usage
a labor
show examples
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
 shortage and
also
Linking Words
, staple
food
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 would
hampered
Verb problem
be hampered
show examples
. Rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
facing
Wrong verb form
face
show examples
 difficulties in providing essential services, like
in
Change preposition
as
show examples
 delivering health care to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rural
people
Use synonyms
because
Punctuation problem
, because
show examples
 of the shortage of
people
Use synonyms
 in taking these roles. In
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
, where
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 related to the agriculture sector,
people
Use synonyms
moving
Verb problem
are moving
show examples
 to urban
cities
Use synonyms
, meaning that
less
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 are available to cultivate the
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
show examples
 for
food
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
. If
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
is
Verb problem
does
show examples
 not
taking
Wrong verb form
take
show examples
 steps to stop these
migration
Fix the agreement mistake
migrations
show examples
,
food
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 will be significantly reduced, forcing the
authority
Check wording
government
show examples
 to import
food
Use synonyms
 to feed the
population
Use synonyms
 of the country. In conclusion, when migration
is happened
Wrong verb form
happens
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a
bigger
Correct word choice
larger
show examples
magnitude
Check wording
scale
show examples
, it
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
burden
Correct article usage
a burden
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the authority where
people
Use synonyms
moved
Wrong verb form
move
show examples
 and
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
shortage
Correct article usage
a shortage
show examples
 of
Correct article usage
the labor
show examples
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
 force
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 ultimately
reduced
Wrong verb form
reduces
show examples
 the main
food
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
. The step administration can take
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 is the
decentralization
Change the spelling
decentralisation
show examples
 of
factories
Use synonyms
 so that
people
Use synonyms
 can work where they live.

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task response
Plan your essay. Start with a clear line that shows your view. Then add 2-3 main points. End with a short finish.
coherence
Make one idea in each paragraph. Use simple link words like and, but, so to show how ideas fit together.
content
Your view is clear that moving to towns is not good.
example
You give a real example from a place to back your point.
structure
You use order markers like First, For example, In conclusion to show flow.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
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