IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. why is this the case? what can be done about this problem?

The persistence of hunger despite these agricultural advances has become a global concern. There are several reasons why
this
Linking Words
 is happening. First of all,
over population
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overpopulation
show examples
 in some countries
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 led to potential
drawbaks
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drawbacks
. By
this
Linking Words
 I mean that it has the potential to cause
lake
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loss
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 of land,
job
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jobs
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, and natural resources.
For example
Linking Words
, in Africa
because
Punctuation problem
, because
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 of
population
Correct article usage
a population
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 boom, a
megority
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majority
 of people are living in poverty and suffering from
hungery
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hunger
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, war and political
issue
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issues
show examples
 have
series
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serious
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affect
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effects
show examples
. To be more precise,
Secoundly
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Secondly
, the
govenment
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government
 could come up with
a
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an
show examples
inform
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informed
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 plan to get rid of famine,
hungery
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hunger
, and poverty. They can
creat
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create
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 lots of job
opportunity
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opportunities
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 for
inividuals
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individuals
, like
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 farming, and support them to have a good income.
Additionally
Linking Words
, they can build a communication with powerful countries and request them in order to help. For
instence
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instance
,
south
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South
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 America
requestd
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requested
 to north America for cooperation and assistance to
relief
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relieve
show examples
 from famine. If
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 invest in
infarstructure
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infrastructure
 and
control
Correct subject-verb agreement
controls
show examples
 the population, the country can be freed from
hungry
Replace the word
hunger
show examples
 and poverty. In conclusion, investing in sustainable agriculture can help prevent famine in the future. In my opinion, the government
shoud
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should
 put some incentives for
citizen
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citizens
show examples
 to encourage them to do agriculture, and
also
Linking Words
 promote
farmeing
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farming
 ways and
its
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their
show examples
 advantages through media in order to raise awareness among people with the best results of farming.

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task response
To do a better task response, set a clear plan. Say what you will cover in a short intro, then give two to three strong ideas, and finish with a short end.
coherence
Make the ideas in order. Use one idea per paragraph and link them with small words like first, next, and finally.
structure
In the intro, say what you will talk about. In the end, say what you think and what can be done.
grammar
Check spelling and grammar. Use easy form of verbs and nouns. Try not to use hard words or wrong spellings.
examples
Give one or two clear examples that fit the idea. The example should be simple and true.
content
Keep a plain tone. Do not repeat the same idea many times. Say one idea well, then move on.
content
The idea to show how a plan can help is clear.
structure
The finish has a closing line that sums up the idea.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
What to do next:
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