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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people say that the only way to guarantee getting a good job is to complete a university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work? discuss your opinion.

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A lot of individuals believe that the only method to guarantee success and getting a great profession is to finish a
university
Use synonyms
 education because there are several good dream jobs that ask for a diploma
of
Change preposition
after
show examples
 finishing the
institute
Change noun form
institute's
show examples
 educational program. Others argue that it is much more beneficial and better to have work experience after completing
school
Use synonyms
 and gain experience from there, as it can help youngers, who are not sure about passing the exam for getting into a
University
Use synonyms
, to develop, grow and learn in their ages.Both views have their merits and the essay will discuss them before presenting my own opinion.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, a wide variety of jobs are available only by having a diploma from a
University
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
 to say, it can help students have more goals that can be achieved by learning , developing and hard working.
For instance
Linking Words
, research conducted by Cambridge
University
Use synonyms
 has demonstrated a young girl, who finished
university
Use synonyms
 with the best results because she worked hard to achieve her dream of becoming a lawyer and she needed to get to Boston
University
Use synonyms
 for education.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, having
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
work after finishing
school
Use synonyms
 can make a student more developed and productive. So, it is really popular in many countries to have these kinds of schools , after middle
school
Use synonyms
 , for teaching and practicing teens about the job that they choose.
For example
Linking Words
, in Turkiya it is really common to educate in these kinds of places after finishing which people can be sure about having a diploma and a work after
school
Use synonyms
 years. In conclusion, it is more academic and high-status to have a
university
Use synonyms
 degree, but it is more easy to get into a job position after graduation,
while
Linking Words
 learning at college there will be a lot of practical experiences, that can prepare students for their future careers.

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task achievement
Clarify and strengthen your thesis statement to clearly indicate your opinion on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that you elaborate on it with specific details or examples.
coherence and cohesion
Work on sentence variety and structure to enhance readability and sophistication in your writing.
task achievement
You present both viewpoints effectively, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your examples provide context to your arguments, which is commendable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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