IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

In many countries, people are choosing to live alone instead of living with their families. Why is this happening? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In most countries, participants are choosing to live independently
instead
Linking Words
 of living with their families. I think
this
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 is a negative development,
although
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 some people see it as a positive development. The main reason why a person should live with their families is because of mental health
,
Punctuation problem
;
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 sometimes living alone can lead to depression
due to
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 living
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
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, feeling left out
or
Punctuation problem
, or
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 even the feeling of being unsafe can cause stress and anxiety.
There’s
Verb problem
There
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 aren’t many resources to prove that, but many experiences state the evidence
than
Correct word choice
that
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 living
along
Use the right word
alone
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 can be exhausting
especially
Punctuation problem
, especially
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 in foreign countries.
In
Change preposition
On
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 the other hand, a big percentage of people
are desiring
Wrong verb form
desire
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 that living alone independently is better than living with
family
Correct article usage
a family
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. Some people would like to live alone with their full privacy and take care of themselves
Punctuation problem
. This
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this
Linking Words
 can be a positive thing, so they learn how to depend on themselves in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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hard ways,
for example
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getting
Punctuation problem
, getting
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 a job, learning how to cook
instead
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on
Change preposition
of
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relaying
Use the right word
relying
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 on family. So,
this
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 considers self-development in some cases. In conclusion, there is so much debate on
this
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 topic
it
Correct word choice
that it
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 has its advantages and disadvantages. But in the
end
Add a comma
end,
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this
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 depends on a
persons
Check wording
person's
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 self-development and how
can they
Correct word order
they can
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 handle living
alone
Punctuation problem
alone,
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 even if
its
Use the right word
it's
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 2 hours away from their families.

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content
Make your answer clear by stating one main view in the first line, then give two main reasons with simple examples.
coherence
Use link words to show how ideas go together, like 'but', 'however', 'for example'. Check small mistakes in phrase like 'on the other hand' not 'in the other hand'.
structure
Keep one idea in each paragraph and use short, plain sentences. This helps the reader to follow your point.
task response
You state a clear view at the start.
coherence
There is a plan with intro, body and conclusion.
content
Some ideas on why living alone may help a person grow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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