IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think that watching TV is bad for children, while others believe that it is useful for them. Discuss both views ang give your own opinion.

There is ongoing debate
as
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
 watching
TV
Use synonyms
 has
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
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 impact
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
children
Use synonyms
's health and
behaviur
Correct your spelling
behaviour
. Others think,
however
Linking Words
, that
TV
Use synonyms
 is helpful for their education and entertainment.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both views and give my own opinion. Spending too much
time
Use synonyms
 in front of
Correct article usage
the
show examples
TV
Use synonyms
 can be harmful for
children
Use synonyms
 as it
impact
Correct subject-verb agreement
impacts
show examples
 their health and
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
. Excessive screen
time
Use synonyms
 may sometimes make them lazy and overweight.
For example
Linking Words
, studies show
children
Use synonyms
 who spend extra
time
Use synonyms
to watch
Wrong verb form
watching
show examples
TV
Use synonyms
 become aggressive, isolated and have difficulty
consentrating
Correct your spelling
concentrating
 on school.
However
Linking Words
, watching
Use synonyms
tv
Use the right word
TV
show examples
 can
alse
Correct your spelling
also
 be beneficial for
children
Use synonyms
's education and leisure. They can learn new, interesting knowledge, words and expand their outlook
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 will make life engaging and easier. Take some educational programs as an example, which can help them learn new things and boost their language skills. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
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 both views are appropriate, so
that
Correct word choice
apply
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parents should limit their
children
Use synonyms
's screen
time
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, watching
Use synonyms
tv
Use the right word
TV
show examples
 can be both useful and hazardous for
children
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Make your view clear in the first part and say it again at the end. Give at least two clear facts or examples.
coherence
Link ideas with small words like and, but, also. Each paragraph has one main idea and the flow is smoother.
language
Check spelling and grammar. Fix easy mistakes like consentrating and alse, and make sentences easy.
structure
Keep a simple structure: intro, two body paragraphs, and a short conclusion.
examples
Use real, clear examples or numbers when you can to back up points.
task response
The essay shows both sides and gives an opinion.
coherence
There is a clear start and end to the essay.
coherence
Some linking words are used, like However, to show contrast.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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