The chart below gives information on the number of workers in different occupations who migrated to Australia betwween 2009 and 2012. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart provides key information about the figures of employment in different kinds of jobs that migrated to Australia in the years ranging from 2009 to 2012. The units are measured in thousands
Overall
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, it is clear from the graph that
accountant
Fix the agreement mistake
accountants
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represent the highest number during the period.
In addition
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, the figures of workers working as Chief and Software
engineer
Fix the agreement mistake
engineers
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were almost similar,
whereas
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computer programmers had the lowest share over the years.
According to
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what is shown,
to begin
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with, 20
thousand
Use synonyms
employees worked in
accountant
Replace the word
accounting
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in 2009,afterwards it increased significantly, reaching more than 25
thousand
Use synonyms
people during 2010.
While
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in the cooking field saw fluctuation over the years,
started
Wrong verb form
starting
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at above 15
thousand
Use synonyms
in 2009, and
then
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the number of employees decreased slightly. In terms of Software accoupation,approximately 19
thousand
Use synonyms
participated throughout 2009, and in 2011, increased to nearly 21
thousand
Use synonyms
workers.
In contrast
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, the computer programmer field had a small number of people
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
only 5
thousand
Use synonyms
individuals shared in the
last
Linking Words
year.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words thousand with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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