IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart shows the percentage of the total world population in 4 countries in 1950 and 2002, and projections for 2050.

the
Fix capitalization
The
show examples
 chart
present
Correct subject-verb agreement
presents
show examples
 the percentage and the projections of the total
world
Use synonyms
 population in 4 countries in 2050 compared to
it
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 in 1950 and 2002.
Overall
Linking Words
, all 4 countries
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
 to have a decline in their total
populations
Use synonyms
 except for India. As can be seen from the chart that India showed an increase from being 15
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
world
Use synonyms
 population in 1950 to
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
17
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in the year of 2002
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
 will
grows
Wrong verb form
grow
show examples
 to about 19
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 as projected in 2050. Meanwhile, at first China filled 23
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the
world
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
, it later
decreasec
Correct your spelling
decreased
 to 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2002 and projected to be only 15
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2050.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 had
fulfill
Replace the word
fulfilled
show examples
 7
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the
world
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
 in 1950, later decreased to 5
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and
projected
Verb problem
is projected
show examples
 to remain at 5
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2050.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
Japan
Check wording
Japan's
show examples
Use synonyms
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
 covered 4
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
Use synonyms
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
 in 1950, yet decreased to 3
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2002 and
projected
Verb problem
is projected
show examples
 to be only 1
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2050.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words world, populations, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • bar chart
  • percentage
  • total world population
  • countries
  • 1950
  • 2003
  • projections
  • 2050
  • comparison
  • trend
  • increase
  • decrease
  • stable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: