IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the changes that took place in three different areas of crime in Newport city centre from 2003 to 2012.

The line chart illustrates the number of
crime
Use synonyms
 incidents in Newport city centre between 2003 and 2012.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was a
dramatical
Replace the word
dramatic
show examples
 decrease
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 burglary,
while
Linking Words
 car theft cases slightly
reduce
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
, and robbery remains
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the least common incident throughout the period. In 2003, burglary started with a very high rate and was accountable for almost 3,500 incidents
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
, it reached
it's
Use the right word
its
show examples
 peak level
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2004 with over than 3,500 cases. After 2004, burglary
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 a downward trend until 2008,
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 it was
Change preposition
at the
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 lowest level of all time,
then
Linking Words
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuated
 for the rest of the period.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
robbery's
Check wording
the
show examples
 trend remains stable with cases under 1,000 and more than 500, with the lowest incident
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2008. Car theft incidents were
also
Linking Words
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
 and
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the least incident
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2006 and 2008
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
,
at the end
Linking Words
 of
period
Correct article usage
the period
show examples
, it was the most common type of
crime
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
according to
Linking Words
 the three
crime
Use synonyms
 categories, 2008 has the lowest
crime
Use synonyms
 rate of all years.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words crime with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remains" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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