IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together,but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Some
people
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 argue that modern
technology
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 helps
people
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 stay closer,
while
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 others believe it pushes individuals
further
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 apart. In my view,
although
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technology
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 has certain drawbacks, it mainly improves how
people
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 connect with one another. Modern
technology
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 makes
communication
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 easier and faster. Video calls and instant messages allow
people
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 to keep in touch even when they live far away.
For example
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, families separated by work can talk face-to-face online, which helps maintain emotional bonds.
In addition
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, social media helps
people
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 meet others who share similar interests, making it easier to build new friendships.
On the other hand
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, online
communication
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 can sometimes cause misunderstandings because tone and body language are missing.
People
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 may
also
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 spend too much time on their phones or social media and ignore real-life conversations.
As a result
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, relationships may weaken if
people
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 rely only on digital
communication
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. Even though
technology
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 has these problems, I believe it still plays a positive role. It is extremely useful when
people
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 cannot meet in person, and any misunderstandings can be solved through clearer
communication
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. With a healthy balance between online and face-to-face interaction,
technology
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 helps
people
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 stay connected rather than become distant. In conclusion,
while
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 modern
technology
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 may create distance when misused, it usually helps
people
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 build and maintain closer relationships.

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development
Give one or two clear examples from life to back up each point.
structure
Show both sides more evenly, with a quick compare.
lexical
Use more common words and simple grammar to keep the text easy to read.
coherence
Use linking words to show how ideas go from one to the next.
position
The writer shows a clear view and sticks to it.
structure
The text is easy to read and flow is clear.
content
The ideas on how tech helps and how it can harm are well shown.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • connectivity
  • communicate
  • social media
  • virtual meetings
  • global community
  • isolation
  • distract
  • face-to-face interaction
  • personal connections
  • dependency
  • technology addiction
  • digital divide
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