IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that fewer working
days
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 more beneficial than our worldwide adopted 5-day-a-week working schedule. Personally, I am inclined to agree that a longer weekend will gain us advantages. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will examine how deteriorating energy and social health, and efficient working are the reasons why shorter active
days
Use synonyms
 are agreeable
Firstly
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
 fast-moving world, a great deal of the population is suffering from depression and stress, which are byproducts of overworking, with limited
time
Use synonyms
 to rest.
For instance
Linking Words
, productive age groups tend to neglect their irregular sleep schedule, physical activity, and social health
due to
Linking Words
 demanding jobs. It is true that some people might choose to do a demanding job and even take a second job in order to get extra income.
However
Linking Words
, having short
off
Use the right word
workdays
show examples
days
Use synonyms
worsen
Correct subject-verb agreement
worsens
show examples
 their well-being as they do not have enough
time
Use synonyms
 to
recover
Verb problem
replenish
show examples
 their energy throughout the week.
Therefore
Linking Words
, having 2
days
Use synonyms
 off each week does not grant them enough leisure
time
Use synonyms
 to replenish their
tiresome
Correct word choice
tired
show examples
 weekdays.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the quality of work can not be determined merely by the number of
days
Use synonyms
 a person is working. A freelance job is a significant example of how employees can manage their own
time
Use synonyms
 for the assigned tasks
however
Linking Words
 they please, but still be able to finish it
accordingly
Linking Words
 and
timely
Replace the word
time
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, it comes down to how people can manage their duty efficiently and prove how a rigid 5-day-a-week labour system is old-fashioned. In sum, I consider more off-
days
Use synonyms
 a week to be agreeable
due to
Linking Words
 its benefit to lessen the social and health impact of job-induced stress. Other than that, efficient and flexible task completion is far more detrimental than solely relying on how many
days
Use synonyms
 an employee is present in the workplace.
Thus
Linking Words
, longer day-offs are better from the socio-health perspective , and they encourage efficient work

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structure
Make a short opening that says your view. Then end with a short close that sums up.
structure
Link ideas with small words like also, but, so, however to guide the reader.
content
Give 1 or 2 clear examples that fit the reason you give.
grammar
Check grammar and word choice. Fix errors in verbs, preps and form.
strength
The idea is clear you want a longer weekend.
strength
The writing shows some plan and a view.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
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