Some people believe that music is a good way to bring people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
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believe that
music
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is one of the best ways to make individuals feel like a part of a community, even if they come from diverse cultures, ages and ethnicities. I firmly agree with
this
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view, because
music
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has a universal appeal and often brings
people
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together through shared interests and collective experiences. First and foremost,
music
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is a universal way of bringing
people
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together. To exemplify,
music
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uses different beats and tunes, yet everyone can sense the emotions in it. Even if the
song
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is in a foreign language,
people
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can differentiate its mood and tell whether it is a sad
song
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or a love
song
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simply by listening to its beats.
For instance
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, the University of Oxford conducted a study on a group of students who were exposed to different types of
music
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in various languages. The study showed that when they played a funky
song
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, all the students shared the same positive vibes; they started dancing, laughing and having a good time.
In contrast
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, when a sad
song
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was played, some of the pupils showed sad facial expressions
and
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, and
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a few of them even started crying.
In addition
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,
people
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from different countries and religious backgrounds can share the same admiration for one
artist
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.
In other words
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, one
artist
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attracts global fans and brings them all together to share happiness and passion by attending concerts and supporting their
favorite
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favourite
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artist
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.
Moreover
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, many
people
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join fan communities and even learn a new language to understand the
artist
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's lyrics, which helps them build connections with others across the globe.
For example
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,
last
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year
a
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, a
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k-pop
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K-pop
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girl group known as Black Pink achieved the highest ticket sales of the past decade. The event was huge, and
people
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are still talking about how fascinating the concert was and how many friendships were formed that day.
This
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powerfully demonstrates how
music
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can unite
people
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from different backgrounds. In conclusion, I believe that
music
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is spiritual and has the power to connect
people
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of different ages and races, bringing them together.
For
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this
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reason, local artists should be supported to spread positivity and strengthen the sense of community for the benefit of both individuals and society.

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Task response
Be clear about your view at once and stay on topic. The task asks how far you agree, so state a strong yes or explain if you see some mix.
Task response
Give strong, real examples you can prove. Do not use ideas that can be wrong or hard to check.
Coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences. Put one main idea in each paragraph and keep ideas in a calm plan.
Coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with easy words like 'also', 'in addition', 'but', 'however' to help the flow from one idea to the next.
Coherence and cohesion
Make your sentences short so the meaning is clear. Break long lines into two small lines if needed.
Task response
The writer makes a clear claim that music can unite people.
Coherence and cohesion
There is a good flow of ideas with some linking words.
Task response
The essay uses examples to show how music can bring people together.
Coherence and cohesion
The answer uses a simple plan with introduction, body and conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
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