IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The dangers of smoking are well known, yet many people continue with this habit. What are the causes of this? How can we reduce smoking in societyQq

It is no secret that
swmoking
Correct your spelling
smoking
 is harmful;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, numerous individuals do not quit
this
Linking Words
 habit.
Whereas
Linking Words
 the problem stems from several factors, a number of viable solutions can be adopted. One major cause of the issue is depression.
In other words
Linking Words
, most people tend to
apply
Verb problem
smoke
show examples
 cigarettes
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 when they are overwhelmed by stress, so smoking helps them cope with it.
For example
Linking Words
, a worker under pressure or a student anxious
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
 upcoming exams
smoke
Correct subject-verb agreement
smokes
show examples
 to calm their nerves.
Moreover
Linking Words
, some teenagers or young people start
this
Linking Words
 habit
due to
Linking Words
 social influence, especially when
thery
Correct your spelling
they
 try to fit in with their friends. A
further
Linking Words
 explanation can be addiction. A significant number of smokers attempt to stop the habit, but usually end up relapsing owing to the
dependance
Correct your spelling
dependence
 on nicotine, the content of the cigarette.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the problem can be tackled through appropriate measures; the first of which is increasing the costs of cigarettes significantly, which leads to
reduction
Correct article usage
a reduction
show examples
 in consumption. Recently, several EU countries raised the prices of tobacco products, which may prove useful in the long term.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it would be better to ban smoking in public places. Another action that can be taken is to promote awareness about the consequences of
this
Linking Words
 behaviour by establishing campaigns and spreading information about
health
Correct article usage
the health
show examples
 hazards of smoking on social media. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 the issue of stopping smoking in society is complex, it is not insurmountable. Only through collective effort can we hope to
overconme
Correct your spelling
overcome
this
Linking Words
 problem.

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tip
Make each paragraph have one main idea and give a clear example.
warning
Fix spell and word form so key words are right (for example 'dependance' -> 'dependence').
tip
Use short, clear sentences to keep the flow.
tip
End with a strong last line that restates your main idea.
structure
The essay has a clear map from cause to fix.
cohesion
It uses linking words like 'One major cause' and 'Furthermore'.
content
It gives ideas about stress and peer pressure as parts of the cause.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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