IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The table shows information about students studying at an Australian university in 2009. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table provides information about the proportions of
students
Use synonyms
 studying in different departments at an Australian university in 2009, classified by gender, first
language
Use synonyms
, and place of birth.
Overall
Linking Words
, females were more dominant in
language
Use synonyms
-based subjects,
while
Linking Words
 males were more prevalent in science-related departments.
In addition
Linking Words
, subjects
such
Linking Words
 as Mathematics and
Physics
Use synonyms
 had the highest proportions of
students
Use synonyms
 whose first
language
Use synonyms
 was not
English
Use synonyms
 and those born outside Australia. In terms of gender,
English
Use synonyms
 and Modern Languages recorded the highest percentages of female
students
Use synonyms
, at 72% and 68% respectively. History and
Physics
Use synonyms
 showed a more balanced gender distribution, with females accounting for 52% and 56%.
By contrast
Linking Words
, calculus and Chemistry were heavily male-dominated, as females represented only 17% and 15% of
students
Use synonyms
 in these departments. Regarding
language
Use synonyms
 background and place of birth, Math had the largest proportion of enlistment whose first
language
Use synonyms
 was not
English
Use synonyms
, at 49%, followed closely by Chemistry (42%) and
Physics
Use synonyms
 (38%). A similar pattern can be seen in the figures for
students
Use synonyms
 born outside Australia, with Mathematics and
Physics
Use synonyms
 both standing at 56%,
while
Linking Words
 Chemistry accounted for 48%. In comparison,
English
Use synonyms
 and Modern Languages had considerably lower percentages in both categories.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 86%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, language, physics, english with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 3 times.
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