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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the percentage of young people in higher education in four different countries in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart compares the proportions of young people who were
study
Replace the word
studying
show examples
 in higher education in four different countries from 2000 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that all four countries experienced general upward trends. Meanwhile,
country
Use synonyms
 D had the largest percentage of students throughout the period,
while
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 B saw the lowest percentage. In 2000,
country
Use synonyms
 D ranked first at 64%, followed by
country
Use synonyms
 C and B
both
Punctuation problem
, both
show examples
 accounted for 46% each, and only 38% of young people in
country
Use synonyms
 A, which was the smallest among all four areas.
Country
Use synonyms
 D increased significantly, reaching 78% in 2005. The number of young people continued to grow, peaking at 80% in 2010.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
country
Use synonyms
 B dropped slightly
approximately
Punctuation problem
, approximately
show examples
 41%, and
then
Linking Words
 recovered to 43% by the final year. Both
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 C and A,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, witnessed a similar proportion, exactly 52% each in 2005.
Although
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 C remained unchanged after 5 years,
Country
Use synonyms
 A
raise
Use the right word
rose
show examples
 to 62% in 2010.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words country with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
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