IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than at seco

It is believed by some experts that there are more benefits in youngsters learning a foreign
language
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 at primary
school
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 compared to
children
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 who start the process at secondary
school
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.
This
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 essay will demonstrate how the advantages exceed the disadvantages,
while
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 acknowledging the drawbacks. A primary advantage of learning a completely new and foreign
language
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in
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at
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 an earlier stage of studies is that there are more chances of fluency. There
are
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is
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 much research that shows that
human
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the human
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 brain is more adaptive to learning in youngsters.
Additionally
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,
children
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 at primary
school
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 are more enthusiastic
in
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about
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 learning new things. Some are even said to be hyperactive, and naturally,
due to
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 their severe
energy
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energy,
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 they tend to spend more time
practicing
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practising
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 the
language
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 by simply talking to friends. Their brain is less consumed with negativity
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therefore
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; therefore
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, it is simpler to let new information in.
For instance
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, youngsters enjoy watching cartoons. In most cases, when there is a new
language
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 being taught to them at
school
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, they voluntarily watch their favourite TV shows in
this
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language
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.
Consequently
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, their ears get more familiar with the right accent and informal speaking. Equally, there are several disadvantages that should be considered. One additional drawback is that
while
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 the high energy in
children
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 can be positive in some aspects, it can reduce their attention span significantly. That said, the learning quality in
children
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 at the primary level is often reduced.
Therefore
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, it can be detrimental. As an example, an adolescent in secondary
school
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 has much more efficiency in studying profoundly, compared to
children
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 who prefer their learning process to flow more naturally.
Consequently
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, the possibility of the
language
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 developing in
long
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the long
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 run is more significant in secondary learners. In conclusion, concentration levels are higher in secondary
school
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 and might help the pupil better. Yet, the advantages of the human brain being more adaptive to learning
in
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at
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younger
Correct article usage
a younger
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ages
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age
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 outweigh the drawbacks.

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task response
State your view clearly in the intro and keep a steady line in the body. Show one main idea per paragraph with a clear link to the question.
task response
Use simple, exact ideas and give real examples to back them up. This helps your point grow.
coherence
Link your sentences with small words like and, but, also, however. This helps the flow.
coherence
Check the form. Try to use the same tense and fix word choice errors so the meaning is clear.
structure
Intro states topic and set up.
structure
Conclusion restates view.
content
Two body parts discuss pros and cons.
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