IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

There have been some problems with public transport in your area recently. Write a letter to the manager of the transport company. In your letter: Describe the problems Explain how these problems are affecting the public Suggest some changes that could be made.

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to tell you about some problems with public transport in my area. Recently,
buses
Use synonyms
 often arrive late and sometimes do not come at all.
Besides
Linking Words
 that, some
buses
Use synonyms
 are old and not clean, which makes passengers feel uncomfortable. These problem affects people. Workers and students are often late for work or school. Old people and children find it difficult to travel, because there are so many passengers on the bus. Because
Linking Words
this
Change preposition
of this
show examples
, some people choose to use motorbikes or cars I would like to suggest some changes. The company should add more
buses
Use synonyms
 during busy times and on time. It is
also
Linking Words
 important to clean and repair
buses
Use synonyms
 to improve the service. I hope you will consider my solution. I look forward to your reply. Sincerely, van anh

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Fix grammar and spelling, e.g. 'These problem' should be 'These problems'; 'Because this' can be 'Because of this'.
structure
Use a new part for each main idea. Put the effects in one part and the fixes in another.
content
Add clear steps or numbers, like 'more buses at busy times' and a plan to clean and fix buses.
tone
Keep a polite tone and a short, clear closing.
tone
The letter is polite and has a clear aim.
content
It shows the problems, how it harms people, and a plan to fix it.
format
The closing is proper and respectful.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: