IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that the internet is a useful tool for education, while others believe it can be distracting to students. What the advantages and disadvantages of using the internet in teaching and learning?

People are divided in their
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
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 regarding the efficiency of the
internet
Use synonyms
, which has become a concerning trend in recent years.
While
Linking Words
 some individuals claim that
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 is
a
Correct article usage
apply
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beneficial for educational matters, others argue that it can create disturbance for pupils. In
this
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 essay, I will disseminate my viewpoint on both sides. On the one hand,
this
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 controversial method has produced some positive outcomes in education. First of all,
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 has
revolutionized
Change the spelling
revolutionised
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 teaching methods in a positive way. To elucidate, it provides
students
Use synonyms
 with immediate access to various online classes anywhere and anytime, which is time-saving, and you don’t need to commute or get stuck in heavy traffic congestion.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in critical situations,
physical
Correct article usage
the physical
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 educational system can adapt the way of teaching by using online classes.
For example
Linking Words
, during the Covid-19 pandemic, when
students
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 were
lockdown
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locked down
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due to
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 the outbreak of
Correct article usage
the corona
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corona virus
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coronavirus
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,
students
Use synonyms
 could participate in online classes and continue their education without any major disruption, thanks to the
internet
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.
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Therefore
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Therefor
Punctuation problem
Therefor,
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 there is no denying that the
internet
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 has played a crucial
in
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role in
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educational
Correct article usage
the educational
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 system.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it has been said that there are some genuine concerns about
students
Use synonyms
 using
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internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
. In fact, given the technological advancements, adolescents are sticking to their gadgets 24/7, and they
prioritize
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prioritise
show examples
 the
internet
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 over main tasks like studying. By
this
Linking Words
 I mean that
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internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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 offers a wide range of endless entertainment, which can make pupils neglect their curriculum.
Consequently
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, it has
long- term
Use the right word
long-term
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 repercussions on their study routine.
For instance
Linking Words
, a survey of multiple parents claims that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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children
how
Correct word choice
who
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 frequently use
internet
Use synonyms
 platforms perform more poorly in terms of
academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
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, and are usually
more
Rephrase
less
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unwilling
Replace the word
willing
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 to study their lessons. In conclusion, from my
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
, meanwhile the
internet
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 is
vital
Correct article usage
a vital
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sources
Fix the agreement mistake
source
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 of information and skill development for
young
Correct article usage
the young
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 generation, unregulated use
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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 risks.
it
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It
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 is
recommeded
Correct your spelling
recommended
 that both parents and educators collaborate to
make
Verb problem
raise
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children
Check wording
children's
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 awareness
from
Change preposition
of
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 the pros and cons of the phenomenon.

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Task response
State a clear view in the intro and restate it in the conclusion. Make a balanced point list.
Coherence
Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and keep ideas in order.
Coherence
Use more linking words to join ideas and avoid long sentence runs. Check spelling and grammar.
Content
Give precise, simple examples that directly back each point.
Language
Check word use: 'internet' vs 'the internet' and use 'for' with 'educational matters' to avoid odd phrasing.
Content
Has a clear idea that the internet can help learning.
Content
Gives a Covid-19 example to show how online class works.
Readability
The text is easy to read despite some mistakes.
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